the alfer life

It's True

2011-02-09T11:36:00.000-05:00

You really do learn something new every day.

An 80-something year old man at the New Place just said his wife needed an appointment to see the "wig picker." HUH?

Apparently he was referring to one of our staff doctors, as a quick google search showed me that "wig picker" is a slang term used in reference to a psychiatrist or psychologist. How is it possible I've never heard this??

Wig picker!!! HAHAHAHA! I am laughing even as I type it.

Clever Karma

2011-01-13T16:46:00.002-05:00

I try to remain in a constant state of not only self-awareness, but also self-improvement, so I get a lot of daily motivation/ponderings/thoughts for which I have at some time or another signed up to receive via email. Many times when I have been struggling with something specific I will get the same message from multiple sources…or even more often (which I only realize later) I’m in a state of non-admission regarding a growth opportunity and the messages are persistent enough that I finally face it and stretch.

Lately I’ve had several thoughts of the day or messages regarding karma, which has given me reason to ponder its essence more fully and realize a definition identifiable in application to my life and where I am right now (and I don’t mean “where I am” as in sitting at the computer in Indiana, but rather where I am in my spiritual and personal growth.)

I’ve always had this nebulous notion of karma in a very general sense, such as when someone cuts me off on the highway and then I see them pulled over by a state trooper two miles later, I think “Ha! Karma!” And then there is my mind-association to the word karma itself, because as an all-things-Beatles junkie, I rarely can read or hear the word without John Lennon singing in my head.

So I’ve been thinking more about karma and what it means, how it is present in my life and why I should be in more awareness of it. I’m pretty sure this is why it slapped me right in the face yesterday afternoon. After all, that which is like unto itself is drawn.

---

I’ve spent the last couple of weeks reflecting on being a better me. That coupled with my recent reading of the book 29 Gifts has put me in a state of consciousness in which I try to keep an attitude of gratitude while looking for opportunities to express that gratitude through something giving and selfless (cue the choir of angels).

My act of generosity this day was to clean off the car parked beside me when I left work (it has been snowing bucket loads here this week). I went about this chore cheerfully and happily, and was feeling pretty good about my “secret gift” to this unknown recipient. That is, until I cleared the snow away enough to see the license plate and realize that I had just spent 15 minutes cleaning snow off the vehicle of an asshole. (choir of angels come to SCREEEEECHing halt).

I spent some time on the drive home mentally listing all the reasons in the world this person did NOT deserve a random act of kindness. Obviously, this thought pattern negated the entire exercise of giving.

--

As I pulled into my hometown, I had come to terms with my unpleasant thought process and knew that I should do something to make amends with (God, the Universe, Karma, Myself, the Asshole) for turning something that should have been so positive into a not-so-nice litany of unkind thoughts directed at the asshole. Enter Karma.

She was dressed warmly (it was still snowing) and carrying a backpack. We were both stopped by a train which had stopped on the tracks, but I was in my toasty warm Jeep and she was on foot in the cold. The train stopped and I could tell she was thinking about jumping it. Aha! My amends-making opportunity! I quickly rolled down the window and asked if she wanted a ride around the train because I was going to drive around it myself. “That would be great if you don’t mind,” she said somehow already seated beside me. “No problem,” said virtuous me. “I didn’t want to wait anymore, either.”

She commences into a breathless oration (can it still be considered an oration when the grammar is deplorable?) “Well, who knows how long you’d have to wait. Those engineers just stop on the tracks to talk anyway and don’t give a rip about anybody else trying to get someplace. You know that’s why that kid died last summer don’t you? Because the ambulance couldn’t get around the train! Why they’re allowed to do that I’ll never know. I’ve called the law on ‘em but it don’t do no good, they just sit there anyway and all I need to do is get to class. Can you believe they didn’t cancel class? That school only cancels if the county is a state of emergency. They don’t care one bit about us trying to figure out how to get there in crappy weather.”

I took a deep breath, not really knowing what to say to that litany of unkind words but thinking we needed a serious energy shift, I asked “What are you studying?”

“Ha. Well, I was studying Criminal Justice, but that was before I come to know there ain’t no justice in this country anyway. There ain’t no justice when a man can hold a gun to a baby’s head to git drugs and money from its mom and then not even get life. No way. I decided to change to Psychology, then I guess I can at least figure out why the guy held the gun to the baby’s head, because there ain’t nothing else you could do about it.”

My head was ready to explode and I was at a total loss of words, which was ok…because Karma wasn’t done yet. “Woa! You can’t turn right on red here! There’s cameras up there in them lights, the cops will come and find you if turn here. You don’t want the law around here coming for you, I can tell you that.”

Gratefully, we arrived at the school and I pulled in to drop her off. Her litany of unkind words continued all the way to the door…where she jumped out of the car without even saying thank you.

Karma, simply put, is the process of cause and effect.

I did some slapping…and got one back. Instant Karma indeed.

News from the Ridge

2010-12-13T11:18:00.000-05:00

Mrs. Sunbather's husband died last week. They had been married for over 60 years and she is very, very sad, so I stopped by to visit and express my condolences.

The first thing I noticed when she answered the door is that it smelled smoky. The second thing I noticed after I walked in the door is that my eyes were watering and my throat was scratchy. The longer I sat there, the worse it got. I knew she didn't smoke and was starting to worry something might actually be on fire. Finally I asked, "Mrs. Sunbather, do you smell smoke?"

She looked at me a minute and confessed. "It's me. I decided I wanted a cigarette today so I bought some a little bit ago."

"Did it make you feel better?"

"No. That's why I smoked the whole pack."

88 years old and able to hotbox an entire pack of cigarettes in just a couple of hours. Impressive, to say the least!

My New Friend

2010-12-02T19:03:00.000-05:00

It appears the New Place might just have a similar cast of characters as my beloved Rock Ridge. I'm still meeting people every day and most the time I have forgotten the person's name within the hour. Not today, though.

"I'm Bob," this ancient person said to me as he extended a hand more gnarled than an old sea captain. "Bob! Well, I shouldn't forget that," I replied.

"You won't if you put an extra O in it," he deviously grinned.

Indeed I won't. Ever.

Just Like Old Times

2010-11-23T10:48:00.002-05:00

I'm at the New Place and just had the opportunity to meet a new resident who will be moving in after Thanksgiving. I greeted her and introduced myself, to which she responded: "My GOD you have big eyes!" I love it.

(Do I ???)

Life Changes Like the Weather

2010-11-12T14:03:00.001-05:00

Change is hard. Feeling feelings is hard. I am tuned into such a damned happy frequency at like 110% of the time, that I hardly know what to do with myself when I'm sad. Or mad. Or anything besides happy. I've discovered, though, that happy can be a state of living...instead of a feeling...and it can most certainly co-exist with sad or mad or anything else. It's possible to be sad but at the same time know you have a very happy life, right?

Yeah, it was a tough summer.

I never mentioned on the blog that my Grammie lived at Rock Ridge for five of the years I worked there. Every morning, I walked straight into the dining room where she was eating breakfast and gave her a hug and a kiss and had a quick good morning chat. Not to start her day...but to start mine. I popped into her apartment throughout the day to see how she was, make sure she didn't need anything, have her listen to my troubles. Sometimes she would even tell me how to solve work related issues without even knowing it. There isn't a grand enough word to describe this graceful, beautiful lady.

Grammie died on August 10, just 2 months and six days shy of turning 96.

On August 20, I worked my last day at Rock Ridge after eight years.

The two events, in reality, were unrelated. But in the big the-universe-always-aligns-things-perfectly picture, it is divine. Rock Ridge was bought on June 1. By June 3, I knew it wasn't going to be a good value match. There are a lot of people with different philosphies on caring for our elders, and while I won't claim that other people are wrong and I am right, I simply can't work for a company who doesn't have the same philosophy as me. I put a lot of love and energy and life into being an administrator of an assisted living. I am not a robot or a clone, and neither are the 52 people who live there. They are mothers, fathers, brothers, aunts, friends, people. They have had heartache and joys. They have lived full and valuable lives. They are not "heads in beds." (I heard this term used by the new company as my heart simultaneously decided that I no longer belonged there.) They are PEOPLE.

While my heart knew that I no longer could work at Rock Ridge and endorse what it was now representing, it also knew that as long as Grammie was there I could never leave. The details are arduous, but suffice it to say the timing of everything was so impeccable, that in my eyes at least, it cannot be disputed that life works out just the way it's supposed to.

This in no way means that it wasn't hard or that it didn't hurt. That it STILL doesn't hurt. Not just losing Grammie--which hurts even more than I could have imagined--but I also lost my daily interaction with all the folks at Rock Ridge. No more daily doses of overheard conversations from my office, the shared wisdom, the dining room drama, and no more daily doses of...Gladys. (Gladys is still there and I visit her every week. She is doing great, though she broke her front tooth and looks like a 92-year-old hillbilly with red hair. It's adorable, but she is terribly self-conscious and is getting it fixed next week.) The anguish that has hung over me since Rock Ridge was sold and Grammie died is starting to lessen. I finally felt like writing about it. This is progress, but I still miss them so much.

I started a new job at a humongous continuing care retirement community (CCRC) in a neighboring town on September 7th. On September 25, I finally ran my sub-5 marathon at the Roadrunner Marathon in Akron, Ohio. I talked to Grammie for the last four miles... and cried my eyes out at the finish.

Change is hard. No matter how much you think you are open to change or try to embrace it...it is still hard, because with all change you experience a loss. Maybe it's the loss of a comfortable routine or maybe it's a person or maybe it's 52 people. Doesn't matter. A loss is a loss, and it's OK to be sad about that...but we must also remember there is always so much to be happy about, too.

Worth the Risk

2010-06-15T06:53:00.001-04:00

I haven't had time to take the blog down yet, but I'm glad. Some things are worth risking discovery by the corporate compliance officer.

Sunday morning, WorkerBee went to the apartment of an 86-year-old male resident to assist him with his morning medication. He came to the door naked, holding a pillow in front of himself. The WorkerBee, on task, was not deterred and continued to enter the apartment to do the medication. That's when she saw the naked lady.

It turns out this woman was a "church friend" and she was "visiting" our resident for the weekend. WorkerBee was pretty freaked out. She stammered out something like "those aren't the kind of church friends I have," and called to report the "incident."

Incident? I don't think so. I say rock on, old people. Rock. On.

p.s. We're up to 16,000 votes!! Please take a few seconds to click the vote button as many times as possible. The folks at the Ridge thank you!

Shameless Plea

2010-06-04T13:03:00.000-04:00

Hello to anyone out there who still reads, and my regrets to you for not being able to share lately the daily humor and awesomeness that is my job. Two things.

Rock Ridge has been sold to a new owner. I have had little time to even breathe, let alone post. Bigger company, more corporate...so my guess is this blog will have to disappear for awhile...so if anyone (Big Bro? You out there?) can tell me how to do that without losing all my past posts, I would be grateful.

Second---below is a message I've sent to all my professional contacts. I'm asking for anyone out there with the means (Facebook, email, blogs, pony express, whatever) to share the link and help us get votes. Anyone who has read this blog for any amount of time knows how passionate I am about this topic. It's much bigger than me...I'm just trying to create an awareness. I'm shooting for the moon and going to the top....who better than Oprah to help a girl out, right? Without further ado...

Greetings!

It has long been my passion to preserve the wisdom of our elderly, so I took a leap and would like for you to help. My co-workers, a few residents, and I have made a video in an attempt to create an awareness about aging (Oprah has never had a show about elderhood!) Please help us spread the word and gather votes. There is no limit to the number of times you can vote!
http://myown.oprah.com/audition/index.html?request=video_details&response_id=3636&promo_id=1

Thank you for helping us spread the joys of elderhood!

Carrie, Defender of the Old

2010-05-21T16:39:00.000-04:00

I've been really preoccupied lately with this notion that this nation needs some sort of Elder Advocacy program. Kind of like CASA, only for old people. They could be their advocate for lots of things...like dealing with the cable company (this makes our residents crazy) or helping them get out of jury duty, but most importantly, they could advocate their healthcare.

Just this week we've had two residents go to the hospital with some type of chemical restraint used because of "behaviors exhibited" by the resident. In one case, the resident had a UTI (this makes old people act crazy), had fallen, and was given MORPHINE for the fall-related pain. She threw her breakfast tray at the nurse. Um, who wouldn't act crazy if they are 94 years old, on strong antibiotics, in as strange place and on freaking morphine??? Instead of considering any of that, the nurse called the doctor and got an order for a psychotropic med for "behaviors." All without the resident's permission...because they deemed her unable to think rationally. I'm pissed just writing about it.

Second example. Another resident is also in the hospital because of a fall. She has dementia. She is in unfamiliar surroundings and she was frightened. She kept pushing her call light. (apparently a lot...but who cares??) The nurse called the doctor and got an order for Xanax for her nervousness. When her daughter visited, the resident's eyes were glassed over and she was DROOLING! No one had even notified (or ASKED) the daughter, who is the medical POA about the Xanax! Incredible!!!

Since there is no Elder Advocacy Program (yet), I made one up. Today, I advocated. I did not make any friends at the hospital, and I'll probably never get another referral from them. But my old people are safe, warm, loved, and off unnecessary mind-altering drugs.

The End.

Friday Funny

2010-03-05T11:30:00.000-05:00

While a crying resident isn't too out of the ordinary around here, a hysterical one is. That's what we had on our hands last night. True hysteria. This is a fairly new resident, who up until last night has been a peach and is always oriented with a sharp mind.

She was sobbing and blubbering. Questions made her cry harder. A compassionate arm around her shoulders made the blubbering worse. Finally, FINALLY, we were able to get down to the nature of the problem.

"I, I, I have u-u-uranium p-p-poisoning!" (imagine Ralphie saying "soap poisoning" here and you'll have a pretty good picture of the dramatics going into this.)

"Uranium poisoning??" we asked incredulously.

"Yes, and it makes me lose my mind!"

"How do you know you have Uranium poisoning?"

"B-b-b-because my p-p-pee is neon yellow," she explained.

"Do you mean a Urinary Tract Infection?"

Yup. That's what she meant alright.

I just love this place.

Photo Friday

2010-02-26T09:46:00.002-05:00

Happy last day of olympic-induced sleep deprivation! I've been too darn tired to write anything with all the skis, skates, and hockey pucks sucking every last second of my time these past two weeks.
Anyway!

It's been a very long time since I had a photo Friday, plus I wanted an excuse to post this adorable picture of Joseph. He's awesome. Even though he has dementia and often doesn't know where he is or why, he told me a story recently about getting shot in World War II and his subsequent year-long stay in a German hospital. In great detail, I might add. He's an amazing person and the conversation reminded me how important it is that we listen to our elder's stories.

There is a proverb that says "every time an old person dies, a library burns to the ground." That couldn't be more true. Our old people have seen and experienced so many things that most of us cannot even fathom. If you have an old person in your life...engage them in a conversation. Ask them about something from their past. Really listen to them. Not only will you make their day, but you'll learn something, too.

p.s. Record your conversations. It's the cheapest priceless keepsake you could ever have.

Um, Really?

2010-02-18T16:10:00.002-05:00

Since I typically write about job humor, I don't think I've ever discussed the fact that I have an absurd knack for finding myself in strange situations. It's true, and happens far more often than is even reasonable to believe. I'm talking about weird things like finding myself in someone else's bed & breakfast bathroom with a 60ish year old woman who is wearing only a bra. Or the time I went running with a peer and asked her if she had a boyfriend after she has courteously asked me about my husband. Apparently I was the only one in the world who didn't know she was gay, not that I care, but that whole boyfriend question? Yeah, awkward. Another time a young woman came to my office (when I worked at a hospital), sharing the woes of her life while trying to leave her baby with me while she went to work. Oh! Then there was the time I was working out and some lady I had never met started exercising beside me. She didn't even introduce herself, but proceeded to tell me that she was recently divorced and that she had put up with a lot of things from that jerk, but as soon as he started looking at their 12-year-old daughter naked she packed up and got out.

I've decided I must have one of those faces that makes people want to vomit their life's story on me. Just now a visiting nurse stopped in my office to say hello. I've met her one other time for maybe one minute. I made the mistake of asking "how are you?" Here is her answer...the abridged edition.

"You know, I'm actually really great although I've been really watching my blood pressure because it's been elevated. I'm the only woman in my family not on high blood pressure medication, and I just want to figure out a way to control it without the pharmaceuticals. Hormones might have something to do with it, but thank God I should be over with that soon! I'm on month five of no period, but of course you have to go an entire year before they'll consider you post-menopausal. God, I can't wait. Back in the 80s I had such terrible PMS, and you know that was before PMS was medically recognized, and when it finally was I felt so validated! Finally I had an answer to why I had tried to kill myself so many times. But that last time when I was pregnant and almost killed my baby, I told God, if you give me a healthy baby I'll never try to kill myself again. But then I got stuck in peri-menopause, which is like PMS only it's worse and lasts longer, so I nearly renigged. I was only having 4-5 good days out of every month, but thankfully I got sober and that program has been tremendous in helping me cope and now I just can't wait to have the whole hormone mess behind me. That and losing about 40 pounds just might keep me off the hypertension drugs!"

Yup. I must have one of those faces, alright.

Overheard

2010-02-03T17:10:00.001-05:00

I love afternoons at Rock Ridge. A group of residents (lovingly referred to as The Peanut Gallery—what else?) assembles outside my office for some conversation and fellowship. I try hard to stay focused on my work…really I do…but sometimes the conversation is simply too much to ignore. Take today for instance. Lois (of the mismatched socks) was doing a little griping about the fact there aren’t enough “good” people living here. Gladys jumped right in and corrected her. “Oh no, we have plenty of good people here. Everyone has mostly good in them! It’s just that sometimes things in life happen and they don’t want to push that part out.” Gladys has such a great life philosophy, even if her wording is a little questionable.

From there, the conversation turned to wine.( Lois thinks that we should serve wine with dinner). She told Gladys how much she would enjoy drinking a glass of wine from time to time if only someone would join her. Gladys said she never much of a wine drinker, but she did like “a little taste of other things from time to time.” (Of course by now, I’ve given up all attempts of work and am straining to hear better.) Lois said “I never like to drink that hard stuff unless I’m home and have a man with me who likes the same thing.” HAHAHAHAHA!!! Gladys immediately starts laughing. Lois is flustered and protests “that didn’t really come out right,” to which Gladys quickly replied “No, it never does in those situations!” I’m convinced she is the quickest witted Alzheimer’s patient who ever existed.

The topic changed again--which it does quite often when you have two people with Alzheimer’s chatting--and Lois proclaimed the best thing about being her age is “knowing Jesus better.” Apparently still not forgetting the earlier part of the conversation, Gladys piped right in with a hearty laugh and “I’m guessing Jesus doesn’t know you nearly as well as we do!”

It is baffling that Gladys could spout her wit like that, but just prior to that she told the exact same story four times…and Lois listened to it four times… as though it were the only time she’d ever heard it. They were both so fully present in that conversation at that instant… I almost forgot they have Alzheimer’s.

During a moment like that, the work can certainly wait.

From the Suggestion Box

2010-01-28T13:37:00.001-05:00

Wednesday Wisdom

2010-01-27T15:23:00.004-05:00

I visited a resident and began the conversation by breaking my own rule of never asking a resident "How are you?" *

"Well, I've been sick" 92-year-old Catherine replied with the all-too-standard answer (and the main reason you should never ask an old person this forbidden question).

"Oh? What's the matter?" I asked, already too far gone to turn back now.

Catherine leaned in toward me as if she wanted to share a secret and whispered loudly: "Let's put it this way. You should never trust a fart."

Indeed not.

*This rule has been in existence since February 2, 2005, which is the day a cantankerous resident turned 100 years old. I made the mistake of asking her the forbidden question and she snappily replied "I'm 100 years old. How in the hell do you think I am?"

The Reason I've Been Absent

2010-01-14T20:18:00.006-05:00

I wonder why it is the things we enjoy the most are the first things we let go when life gets hard or busy. Shouldn't it be the other way around? When life is stressful or hard or whatever, we should do MORE of what we enjoy to counteract the bad stuff. I wish it worked that way...because if it did, I would have been reading, writing, running, going to yoga, or any other number of things these past two months. Instead? Nada.

I spent several weeks with an incredible amount of anxiety about the future of Rock Ridge. Not my future there, but Rock Ridge's future. I have an unfortunate talent for worrying about other people...so I spent days upon days worrying about every single resident, their families, my staff, and their families. I didn't run. I didn't write. I didn't read anything inspirational. I didn't pray. I just walked around with a heavy heart and a sad countenance.

I am beyond delighted that The Deal That Would Have Changed Everything didn't happen, but I'm also wiser for having had the experience. (I originally wrote that I'm disappointed in myself...but decided that anytime learning takes place we are better for it, so wiser is a better word) This new wisdom means that should I ever find myself in this position again, I will certainly do things differently.

This time: I can't even begin to think about how much energy I wasted worrying and stressing about things that were absolutely and completely beyond any control.

Next time (although I'm hoping there never is a next time): I will spend that energy on the things I can control. Like loving the residents. Hugging them. Enjoying them. Being happy myself so that I can contribute to their happiness and joy. (or going for a run when I need it most!)

This time: A change seemed inevitable, therefore I stopped being really good at my job. I let staff get away with things I normally wouldn't. I didn't do reports. I let things slide. My heart simply wasn't in it. What a disservice to my residents and staff. What a disservice to myself!

Next time: I will act as if. I will act as if nothing is changing...until it really does. I will act as if everything is as important today as it was yesterday. I will act as if I am the best person for my job, and will not allow the feelings of helplessness and uncertainty for the future set the agenda for my day.

This time: I might have actually forgotten for a few days why I do the work I do and that I'm a positive, happy person by nature.

Not just next time, but every day for the rest of my tenure as the director of Rock Ridge: I will ALWAYS remember why I go to work every day and I will never forget who I am...just because of some Deal That Would Change Everything. No matter how much something changes...I'm still me...and I still really love old people.

The End.

Note to Jeff: Thank you for your message. You were the prod I needed.

Is it really December already?

2009-12-01T11:19:00.007-05:00

I wish I had more time to share the daily goodies that come my way, but man this place is nuts. I'm also providing administrative support to a sister property who lost their director, so all my little post-it notes of things I want to remember to write about will have to continue to wait for another day. Until then, though, here's a little piece of hilarious conversation that took place outside my office door on Tuesday of last week.

Lois (of the mismatched socks): "Gladys, is Thanksgiving tomorrow?"

Gladys: "Well, I don't know. Is it this week?"

Lois: "Joseph, do you know if Thanksgiving is tomorrow?"

Joseph: laughs "Huh. Well. I guess I don't know."

Lois: to Little Miss Chatterbox "How about you? Do you know if Thanksgiving is tomorrow?"

LMCB: "You know, that's a funny thing, Thanksgiving. I said to my daughter on the phone this morning that Thanksgiving should be coming up, and then she told me when it was. I wonder if we'll have turkey here? Everyone always thinks you have to have turkey on Thanksgiving, but I think why should it always be turkey? We could have something besides turkey. And stuffing! All that bread? Why should people serve that every Thanksgiving. Really. But anyway she told me when Thanksgiving was, but I don't think I can remember."

Lois: still not giving up "Maude? Do you know if Thanksgiving is tomorrow?"

Maude, who is 99 and performing true to her usual form, put an end to the entire conversation by replying "How in the hell should I know?"

I love old people.

Mid Week Treat

2009-11-18T10:44:00.007-05:00

I caught this group of happy people yukking it up yesterday afternoon outside my office. They were laughing so much I had to go see what all the commotion was about. Can you tell what was so funny by looking at the picture?

Joseph and Gladys were laughing at Lois (far right) because she was wearing one knee high panty hose and one black sock with her sandals. On accident, of course. Lois laughed right along with them. It was hilarious. Assistant then told them how I showed up to work one day wearing two different shoes (true story). They thought that was even funnier. I thought Gladys was going to pass out she was laughing so hard. Listening to three people with dementia laugh like there's no tomorrow is very high on the list of reasons I love this job.

As we were laughing, Little Miss Chatterbox wandered upon the scene interested in what the commotion was all about. She was, of course, wearing her lab coat (see, I don't make this stuff up!) , though I think it has been hemmed...which makes me wonder....who in the world would have hemmed a lab coat for an 89-year-old assisted living resident to gad about in?!?

Happy Hump Day. It's been a fun week at the Ridge!

p.s. Speaking of Hump Day... when Assistant woke Joseph up the other morning he groggily looked at her and asked "Can you have kids?" She told him that no, she already had kids. "Then can I stick it in?" he very politely asked. HAHAHAHA!

That Damn Naomi

2009-11-16T14:59:00.005-05:00

Gladys just came to the office to report that Naomi had stolen her roll of toilet paper. "Isn't that just terrible?" she asked. "Stealing toilet paper! I declare, that's about as low as a person can get."

"Yes, stealing toilet paper is terrible, " I concurred, "but how do you know Naomi did it?"

Gladys didn't even hesitate before replying: "Well, maybe she didn't! I think you need to make a list of everyone with diarrhea and then you'll know who took it!"

Sounds like a good job for Assistant.

Zurich, Part One (and Photo Friday!)

2009-11-06T13:18:00.005-05:00

I left Indianapolis on Monday, October 19th after being delayed for about an hour from our original departure time. We then sat on the tarmac for another 40 minutes before taking off. (Which I think totally sucks....why didn't they just leave us comfortably sitting at the gate?) Come to find out, we left Indianapolis late, sat on the tarmac for 40 minutes, and then circled Newark for 40 more minutes because apparently the vice-president was at the airport. I understand the need for security and all that....but how can one guy be responsible for me nearly missing an international connection when I had a 3½ hour lay-over built into my intinerary? BUT, why complain? All's well that ends well! I didn't miss my connection, I met up with my awesome Boss and we boarded the plane to Zurich about ten minutes later.

The woman sitting beside me on the Indianapolis to Newark leg was on her way to Romania, where she had been living for the past five years. She was an IU graduate who had majored in opera, when she decided she wanted a new life and relocated to Romania to work for an organization who helps orphans. Four years ago, she fell in love with an orphaned baby boy and is now going through the process to adopt him. In order to adopt a child in Romania, you have to first establish residency...which means you must live and work solely in that country for 60 months. That's SIXTY, not six. People have such amazing stories...and here is the "turn lemons into lemonade" segment of this speech...I would have never known this woman's story if we hadn't circled Newark for 40 minutes.

To say I felt like a pile of poo when we landed in Zurich is an understatement. I couldn't sleep on the flight, partially because I was excited but mostly because the guy across the aisle from me had the worst set of adenoids I've ever heard and I spent most of the nine hour flight fighting my gag reflex everytime he snored in a big loogie.

Upon making it to the hotel, taking a shower and drinking eleventy cups of coffee, I started coming around , so we took off on a walk down Bahnhofstrasse. Bahnhofstrasse is touted as one of the world's most exlusive and expensive shopping avenues. I just liked looking at all the watches and expensive chocolates! And I'm not sure it's all that exclusive, anyway....a quarter pounder by any other name is still....a quarter pounder.

Later that night, we met up with our group for the first time for an outing on the fondueshiffe, or Fondue Boat. Uh, YUM. Seriously, what could be better than an entire dinner of cheese and bread? I was a happy, albeit tired, Hoosier girl.

After taking the tram back to our hotel we were invited by two of our new Austrian friends for a "sleeping drink." At this point, I could have slept standing up, and I knew that a drink of any sort would be my total undoing...but how do you say no to one 6'4" Austrian woman and another Austrian woman who rolls her own cigarettes, both of whom you just met? Yeah, you don't! So the "sleeping drink" was actually grappa, and it was served by a German-speaking Indian man at a Thai restaurant. Think about that! Isn't that funny? Or was it just funny to me because I had been up for two days? Well, regardless, this German-Indian-Thai-guy poured us all grappa and everyone raised their glasses saying prost and I took my first sip. WOWZA!!! I didn't know it was legal to serve diesel fuel as an alcoholic beverage in Switzerland.

Even as bad as it tasted, I somehow managed to finish the "sleeping drink."

And then, before I even knew what was happening....I fell asleep at the table.

Happy Weekending!

Alive

2009-11-03T13:21:00.002-05:00

Because I have descended from a long line of Irish/Italian Catholic guilt, and I don't want to feel guilty about my big bro worrying about me, here's a a quick and generic post. I'm here and well. Except for a bad case of bronchitis, compliments of sharing airspace with 200 hacking, sniffling, sneezing people on the way home from Zurich.

The experience in Switzerland was incredible. I have much to write about, but first I must uncover my desk from ten days worth of neglect.

I will be back. Tschuss!

Living in a Dream

2009-10-08T11:56:00.006-04:00

It's been nearly a month since I posted, which seems impossible. That's how utterly busy life has been. So busy that an entire month has passed in what seems like two days. I'm out of all my regular routines and I feel almost like I'm living in someone else's life. Like a dream, I guess. It's weird.

But awesome.

An overview:
Home. My parents had a mini-disaster at their house three weeks ago. They were away for a long weekend and came home to find a pipe had broken in the bathroom, which resulted in a pretty tremendous mess. The bathroom was a total loss, and the basement...well everything in it was thrown away...including the furnace, washer, and dryer. Due to the extent of the damage they are unable to stay at the house, and are (wait for it)

Living with me and Hubby!

Haha! I know that sounds like some people's version of hell on earth, but for me this has actually been really fun! I love drinking coffee with my mom in the mornings. I love coming home late from work to the smell of her potato soup (that only tastes right when SHE makes it), I love that someone else will empty the dishwasher, and mostly I love the fact that I'm lucky enough to still have both my parents and am able to let them shack up with me. So far the only downsides are: No naked house walking, toilet seats being left up (cut that out, Mom!) and staying up too late because we talk too much. Not bad at all, I'd say.

Work. This place is crazy busy!! We are at the highest occupancy we have ever been and people are calling and stopping by nearly every day for information and tours. It's amazing and I love it, but I've worked waaaaaay too many hours lately. Which is why I'm not going to feel bad about being away for ten days while I'm in Zurich.

Yup, that says ZURICH! WHEEEEEE! I'm going to Switzerland!!! I've been invited to attend an International Symposium on Validation Therapy for people with Alzheimer's. This is an incredible opportunity to meet some world re-knowned people in my industry. Actually, this is such an incredible opportunity that I don't even have my head all the way around it yet. It's unbelievable.

Again, like a dream. Sometimes, when you're busy minding your own business and taking care of your old people, something really great happens. According to Gladys, anyway. :)

Nuggets from the Ridge

2009-09-11T14:07:00.011-04:00

Joseph told Assistant that she could "hold it for a minute" when she assisted him to the bathroom. Very thoughtful, no?
~~
Gladys fell. She didn't break any bones, but she is very sore. She doesn't remember falling, doesn't remember getting x-rays, and she doesn't remember that she hurts until she tries to move. It's awful. Every time she tries to get up or move we have to remind her what happened, which usually causes her to be very upset that she doesn't remember something as serious as a fall. It's a vicious circle. But, true to her personality, she still has a great attitude. She was lamenting about what was going to happen to her and that she was "no good to anyone," when I told her she didn't need to worry about any of that and to just sit there and look pretty. Without hesitation she looks at me so seriously and says, "Well, you'll have to find me a fake face if you expect me to do that!" Have I ever mentioned that I love her?
~~
Because she is so sore, the staff have been helping Gladys get ready for bed at night. One evening as Gladys sat on the toilet, Assistant was gathering her night clothes. "Do you need clean underwear?" Assistant asked.
"I don't know. I'll have to check," Gladys replied as she bent over and took a deep sniff at the crotch of her pulled down panties*. "Nope. Guess not!"
~~
I was helping take orders during lunch. A fairly new resident, who is not only confused but also grumpy (and ready to die, as he repeatedly reminds us) was being somewhat cantankerous. He is also hard of hearing. Because I was speaking to him in a calming voice, I had to lean in close to his face so he could hear me. He looked me in the eye and said very loudly, "I don't know what you're saying to me, but if you get any closer I'm going to kiss you."
~~

Ya can't beat old people for a smile!
Happy Weekending!

*Gladys doesn't wear underwear. She wears panties...usually pink silk. She rocks.

There's a reason Sir MixaLot didn't sing about liking BARE butts

2009-09-09T11:21:00.010-04:00

We've lost a couple of employees these past two weeks, and although their leaving has been an overall positive thing for our team, it still presents a difficulty in covering shifts until someone new can be trained. In the interim, Assistant and I have been chipping in with meal service and resident care. While I am proud to be the type of administrator who would never ask a WorkerBee to do something I wouldn't do myself, I've decided during the challenge of the past two weeks that just because I will do something, doesn't mean I want to do it.

I can serve lunch every day for a year and really not mind it one bit. But helping someone pull their pants down and putting my hands on their bare hips to guide their exposed derriere to the john? Standing in the bathroom until they've finished "producing" (as one sweetheart resident would say) only to hand them toilet paper, help them get up off the john, and pull their pants back up? Or even worse, helping them into a dry Depends? Yeah. Not loving it.

The thing is, though, that it is worse for the residents! Being in the role of caregiver changes the dynamic of my relationship with the them. I'm the person they come to with concerns or ideas for the betterment of Rock Ridge. I'm the person to whom they can express their opinions and feel like they are having an intelligent and productive problem-solving conversation. We talk about things that make them feel like they still have value as a human being. It makes them feel important and useful. When they hold their Resident Council Meetings and ask me to give the Administrative Report, not one of them wants to watch me talk and have to think "she's seen my naked butt." I hate that for them.

And being totally truthful here, I hate it for me.

Because I now know exactly what my ass is going to look like in 60 years.

Yeah. Not loving it.

TGIF Photo Friday

2009-08-28T10:52:00.005-04:00

Much has been going on administrative-wise, which basically means I've had a really boring office job lately. Luckily I have Gladys to break up the monotony. She had a dream the other night that one of the Workerbees told her she stunk. When she woke up, she thought it had really happened and was she ever upset. I consoled her and assured her it was a dream. Before she left the office, she got up close and whispered "Could you smell me, just to make sure?"

Running. I've run twice this week and plan to go 7 tomorrow. I'm finally back on the wagon.

Photo Friday. Today is the 15th anniversary of the closing of our house. We moved in the very next day...and have been working on it ever since! We've re-wired, re-plumbed, remodeled, knocked out walls, built a deck, put on new siding, fixed the roof, replaced every window, and have loved every minute. The photo is a picture of a painting of our happy house. I had a local artist paint it for Hubby as a Christmas gift a few years ago. The landscape has changed since then (it's much better), but I still love the painting.

And the house.

Lost and Found

2009-08-26T17:06:00.007-04:00

I've been in a meeting this afternoon and just returned to my office. This is sitting on my conference table. No note. No explanation. No idea.

This place is so weird.

Random Thought for Thursday

2009-08-19T09:58:00.005-04:00

Back in April when we were in Boston for the marathon I had a delightful conversation with another runner at a bar. (We are now considered the founding members of the Apres Expo Drinking Club. Hopefully we will reunite next April, so if anyone would like to consider membership in this exclusive club just drop me a line.) Part of our conversation was a discussion based on the number of tooth "pik" flosser thingies we see on the street while on a run. Seriously, those little suckers are everywhere! Everytime I see one, I think of Moe in Boston and ponder exactly why it is that someone obsessed with their oral hygeine wouldn't also be a little concerned with the earth's hygeine and take the time to throw their gross little tooth pik into the freaking trash instead of on the ground. But I digress.

I do 99.9% of my running on a trail, so I rarely run on the street anymore. I did, however, take off running from home last week because I was short on time and needed to get one in. I had forgotten how entertaining running on the street can be! Not only did I see two tooth piks and the normal trash one would expect (I HATE litterbugs!), but also a CD, one pink knock-off-brand Croc, money, a shirt, a cassette case, a smashed GI Joe guy, and a glove. How does stuff like that get on the street anyway? One shoe? Seriously? What about the shirt? How does such random stuff like that get on the side of a street? Am I weird for wondering?

Wednesday Nuggets

2009-08-19T08:46:00.005-04:00

One little guy with dementia (who is so sweet he gives me a tooth-ache) woke up really disoriented this morning. When WorkerBee suggested he get up and go to the bathroom, he sighed and said: "All right. If you want to hold it, you can."
~~~
I hate wearing shoes, and usually kick them off under my desk. Yesterday, as I flounced through the lobby in my bare feet, Garnet remarked that I was "Better Foot." "Do you mean barefoot," I asked? "Nope. I mean Better Foot. My kids used to call it that...and if you think about it, it really is better." Agreed! I love it.
~~~
Gladys thinks that Naomi* has stolen her vacuum (every single day) and she keeps coming to my office to "report" it. She gets really upset...which is one of the reasons her quick wit always catches me off guard. The last time she came to tell me about it I promised her I would contact Naomi's family and get the vacuum back for her. Gladys responded with "That's so very nice of you, but I think the whole situation sucks." I laughed all afternoon.
~~~
*still dead

TGIF

2009-08-14T11:33:00.003-04:00

Freddie just told me he liked it when I wear dresses. "You do?" I asked.

"Oh, yes. I can see your legs A LOT better. " Almost inaudibly and with an ornery twinkle in his eye he added, "And I like to look at them."

He has to be the horniest 97-year-old I've ever met.

~~~~~
Running! I went twice so far this week, with a five-miler planned for tomorrow. Yippee!

~~~~~
Photo Friday! A couple of goodies from our Circus Week celebration at the Ridge. Who has more fun than old people?

Happy Weekending!

TGIF

2009-08-07T09:10:00.006-04:00

I'm really not too superstitious or into astrology...but I do have to admit that there is something to that full moon stuff. We've had a special kind of crazy going on the past few days. Like residents asking us to help them "get their bowels out," or confused residents talking about how confused other residents are, or the guy who showed up to supper soaking wet and acted like he didn't even notice. Oh, and how can I forget the potential resident whom I met for the first time this week? I knew her for five whole minutes when she proceeded to tell me all about the man she was married to for 20 years before he decided "he liked the boys," and continued to refer to him as "the queer" for the rest of the conversation. Oy.

Then we have Little Miss Chatterbox, who has taken to wearing the lab coat daily. I heard someone ask her if she was a pharmacist. (They were serious.) Gladys thinks Naomi has been taking her teabags while she's out of the apartment. 98-year-old Maude tripped and fell. Before I could even ask if she was alright she threw her cane and purse and yelled "Damn it all to hell." Apparently she was still mad later. She dumped her salad on the table at lunch because the man she was sitting with didn't want one. I guess she doesn't like eating alone? There's more, but I need to cut it short because I can hear Joseph coming (his walker wheel has a distinct squeak) and he's going to want to know about mass. Again.

Here's my Friday Photo! I'm eight years old, and on the left (as you look at the screen, Big Bro. Or the right, if you turn your back to it. Geez.)

I ran twice this week. Next week will be even better. Happy weekending!

Overheard

2009-08-05T15:18:00.006-04:00

Freddie's daughter picked him up for a doctor's appointment a little bit ago. As they were preparing to leave, the daughter (who treats 97-year-old Freddie way too much like a child, in my opinion) asked him if he should wear a brief. "We have a half-hour car ride, Daddy. What if you have an accident?"

In a tone that I surmise is caused by the exhaustion that accompanies years of being babied by the daughter, Freddie replied: "Well, then you can roll down the window, plug your nose, and I'll stick my ass out the window."

I love old people.

Tuesday

2009-08-04T15:58:00.003-04:00

Gladys told me that she thinks Joseph is "failing."

"Why do you think that, Gladys?"

"Because he is really confused today. Do you think he could have Alzheimer's* or something?" she asked. Gladys is so damn cute it hurts. I hope someday, if the plaques and tangles attack my brain, that I am just like her.

*Gladys has a confirmed diagnosis of Alzheimer's Disease. She is the one and only reason I might wish to be 18 again...simply because this time around I wouldn't mess with the Journalism, er, I mean English, oh wait, I mean Speech Communication majors. Instead, I would study brain science. Alzheimer's is equally fascinating and frightening...and it is incredible to witness how the disease manifests in people with different personality types.

~~~~~~~~AND~~~~~~~~

I finally ran.

It hurt.

How can someone who just ran a marathon six weeks ago already be so out of shape?

Awesome Athlete

2009-08-03T10:13:00.009-04:00

I love Kara Goucher. She is to running what Tiger Woods is to golf, or maybe even what Michael Jordan was to basketball...but if you were to run into Kara (like on the street in Boston!) she would stand there and talk to you. I can't think of any other sport where an elite athlete...the best of the best...would take the time to chat and take a picture. Besides being a quality person, she's also a workhorse. 120 miles a week! That's more than I've ever managed in an entire month.

Finally. I have found the inspiration today to actually go for a run.

(She even beat all the boys yesterday!)

Kara Goucher wins in Chicago, big goals await in Berlin
by Doug Binder, The Oregonian
Sunday August 02, 2009, 11:38 AM

More than 14,400 runners rocked while Kara Goucher rolled at the inaugural Chicago Rock and Roll Half Marathon on Sunday. Goucher, who is running 120 miles per week in preparation for the Aug. 23 IAAF World Championship marathon in Berlin, won the rac outright in 1 hour, 8 minutes, 5 seconds.

Goucher passed the last of the male challengers with more than two miles to go and ran alone to the finish. The race didn't offer prize money and Goucher, who was the focus of "Kara Cam" throughout the race, was the lone headliner.
"It was fantastic," Goucher said. "(Race organizers) kept me very busy but the people here were so friendly."
Goucher threw out the first pitch at a White Sox game on Saturday and used the half marathon as a training exercise. She gave chase to Deena Kastor's U.S. record of 1:07:34, but really wasn't focused on her finishing time.
"I thought I could run 5:12 (per mile) for the first half and 5:08 for the second half and then with a big kick maybe I could get (the record)," she said.Goucher, and her husband, Adam, were booked to fly out of Chicago Sunday evening for Europe. They will join other Nike athletes at training camp in St. Moritz, Switzerland.
How focused is Goucher's training? When her flight to Chicago was delayed by three hours last Thursday, she went to the Nike store located inside the Portland airport, picked up shoes and running clothes, and did a 40-minute run along Airport Way so that she didn't waste the extra time in the terminal.
In Chicago, where bands played at different points on the course, Goucher intended to use the race as a rehearsal for Berlin. But really, it was a vastly different sort of event.
"It's really nothing like Berlin," Goucher said. "People were talking to me until the fun went off."
But it became a chance to have fun and be a role model.
"There were a lot of young girls in the race, so it was nice to make a girl-power statement," Goucher said. "And all of the guys were very gracious."
Her next race will be much more serious, and Goucher believes she can be a factor in the outcome.
"I believe I wouldn't be running the marathon (in Berlin) if I didn't have a shot," she said. "If I run fully committed, I do have a shot."

TGIF Photo Friday & Ethnic Slurs

2009-07-31T11:16:00.010-04:00

Gladys remarked (yet again) about how tan my arms are. Today, however, she added "You look like a little dago." HAHAHA!

Photo Friday isn't very exciting, but this is what I need to put out there this week. Maybe it will help me break out of some bad habits I've developed over the past few weeks.

Is that me? What? I'm a runner?? Interesting. Perhaps then maybe I should...oh, I don't know....run?

Friendly reminder to Self: This is what you look like when you eat whatever you want whenever you want (who eats a lobster roll at Fenway? Seriously?) and don't move much. Stop eating crappy food and start running. Chubbiness lurks...but it is 100% preventable.

Happy Weekending. Maybe I'll try to fit in a run....if I can remember how.

Frisky Freddie

2009-07-30T10:17:00.002-04:00

97-year-old Freddie just sang a love song to me as I sat down to visit with him. He told me that singing made him feel happy. I agreed with him, telling him that I often start the day by singing in the shower.

At the word shower, he hesitated only briefly before raising his eyebrows in exaggerated fashion and saying "well, now that is a little out of my jurisdiction."

TGIF Photo Friday

2009-07-24T08:00:00.001-04:00

Here are some shots from this year's circus, taken by a friend of mine who is both a photographer and a clown. Not many people can put both of those titles on a business card.

This is the only 7-person pyramid in the world comprised of all females. It was taken from the catwalk. It is an amazing feat, performed by young girls all under the age of 19.

I love this picture because it was always one of my favorite acts to perform. I wish I was still that bendy! The hoop is hanging by the neck of her upside-down partner.

This was also taken from the catwalk, and shows how big our circus band is. All volunteers, and all fun.

And these little piggies....well, I like to play my flute barefoot. What can I say? At least the red polish covers the dark purple toes, still courtesy of Grandma's Marathon. (and I have no idea why he snapped pictures of my feet, but like I said, the guy is a clown.)

Photographer credit: Thank, C U Smile!

From one circus to another...

2009-07-23T09:54:00.004-04:00

The thought has occurred to me before that being at Rock Ridge has great similarities to the circus, so I'm not feeling sad about Circus Week ending. For me it seems to have continued right on into this week, which has been insanely busy. Or just insane. That would be an apt description as well.

I have spent most days this week avoiding Little Miss Chatterbox, whose daughter apparently told her she had dementia. So now LMC wants to remove said daughter as her POA and also wants to talk and talk and talk and talk some more about it. (Random question: Does anyone think it’s a good idea to tell someone with dementia that they have dementia? In case you aren’t sure…the answer is no. As in NO WAY.) I’ve never bitch-slapped anyone, well I don’t even really know what a bitch-slap is, but if I did and I was going to….I would bitch-slap Little Miss Chatterbox’s daughter.

I've also spent a good amount of time reassuring Gladys that I'm going to kick some Naomi ass because that dead bag keeps stealing her stuff. It makes Gladys giggle when I tell her I’m going to beat up Naomi, and she giggles even harder when I show her my guns. Even when she has told me a million times in one day that Naomi stole all of her makeup, I love her like crazy.

Tomorrow I’m going to Boston, for what I'm guessing will be another circus-similar experience. I have a family reunion this weekend. I’m sure I’ll have a story. Or four.

Happy Weekending!

TGIF Photo Friday

2009-07-17T10:24:00.003-04:00

I wish I had to time to find and scan some old circus pictures, but all I have right now is this group picture taken in 1989. Trust me, I'm in there. You can't miss the hair.

This was a few years ago in the "back lot," which is where all the kids hang out waiting for their act to go on. We have a big circus family! Hubby was the back lot door nazi, my sister (in purple) was a rigger, my niece was a performer, I played in the band, and my mom was an usher. My dad was just along for the show in this picture, but he used to rig when my sibs and I performed. Fun stuff.

Happy Weekending! I'll be at the circus!

May All Your Days Be Circus Days

2009-07-15T15:10:00.002-04:00

Our town is steeped in circus history, dating back to 1884 when the local livery owner opened the Wallace and Company’s Great World’s Menagerie and International Circus. It was a huge success and soon grew to be one of the largest and most renowned circuses in American history, using our hometown as headquarters. Many circuses followed suit using the town as their winter quarters because of our convenient location on both a river and a railroad. History continued to be made here for the next sixty years until 1941, when Ringling Brothers bought out the small shows, still struggling to recover from the Depression. Our history is amazing, really. An important piece of Americana… right here in our small Midwestern town.

In 1959, some townsfolk got together and asked the retired circus people who still lived in the community if they would be willing to train a few high-school aged kids to perform acts. They wanted to put on a circus to celebrate our great circus history. The circus people agreed, and that first performance on the courthouse lawn has grown over the past 50 years into an amateur circus with a permanent big top and 200 kids performing annually every third week in July.

So, it’s Circus Week! This is a week when “circus kids” come home. It’s a week when doctors, lawyers, dads, moms and hundreds of other volunteers take off their normal hat and put on the hat of usher, rigger, bandleader, ringmaster, wardrobe mistress, ticket seller, or any of the other countless titles that help make the Greatest Amateur Show on Earth come alive. This is a week when you see everyone you ever knew in your whole life.

Circus Week never fails to awash me in nostalgia. I find my mind’s eye looking fondly upon my tiny 7-year-old self with my hands gripped around an equally tiny trapeze bar. I see a 13-year-old me being tossed between two upside-down boys with big muscles high above a net. I see my 18-year-old self hanging by nothing but my toes 30 feet in the air…and loving every minute of it. I loved hanging upside down and hurriedly searching for the faces of my parents, knowing right where they would be….every single night. I loved nailing a difficult trick, performing it perfectly, my cheeks almost hurting because my smile was so wide, yet quickly slipping out of the role of performer to hurry back into the arena to watch my little sister do her act. I would hold my breath as she flew through the air, only exhaling when her hands connected with the catcher. It wasn’t just my sister I would watch. We all watched each other. This was special…this support of performers. We were all one, everyone wanting everyone else to catch the trick, do their best. We would stand in clusters with our fingers crossed, sending out good circus juju to our brothers and sisters in sequins with nothing being more important than that very moment. We never wanted to see anyone fail, and if someone missed you could hear a hundred kids all groan in sympathy. That collective sense of being a part of something undoubtedly helped shape me into the adult I am today. I also think that is the same thing that keeps everyone coming back year after year.

This is my 30th year of involvement with the Amateur Circus. In some way, every year since that seven year old girl with pigtails put on a pretty costume and styled her first style, I’ve been back. Circus folk say that the sawdust gets in your blood, and I would have to agree. I can’t think of anything better to be infected with.

TGIF Photo Friday

2009-07-10T10:01:00.010-04:00

Apparently a really important piece of equipment our maintenance man calls the "poop pump" has broken down. All I know is that it smells like shit in here. My eyes are watering and I'm distracted, so here's my quick post of the day.

My best girls, my best friend, my best cousin (carrying my godson!), and a really cute niece...in that order. Happy weekending!

She keeps talking and talking and talking...

2009-07-08T09:42:00.006-04:00

Little Miss Chatterbox, all 4’6” of her, is walking around wearing a long white lab coat. By long I mean it touches her ankles. She looks ridiculous…and where on earth she came up with a lab coat to wear, I’ll never know! (All I could do was shake my head and wonder for about the millionth time already this week "what the hell?" It's unbelievable how many times that phrase echoes through my mind on any given day at Rock Ridge!)

Anyway, nothing gets by Gladys. She made some comment to Little Miss Chatterbox, and although I couldn't hear what she said, apparently it referenced the lab coat. So now, all I can hear is the low whine of Little Miss Chatterbox’s grating voice buzzing outside my office. “Well, sure it’s bright and white. Anything can be if you wash it right. No one does laundry right anymore, that’s the trouble. People just buy new clothes because they don’t know how to do the washing, well I say that’s a shame. I only have what I have and nothing more, and I don’t need anymore because I know how to do the washing. My daughter says I need some new clothes but I say what’s the use in that as long as I can take care of what I have and taking care of it means knowing how to do the wash. I’ve had this blouse since 1979 and it still looks brand new and that’s because I take care of what I have.” I've said it before, but this woman’s oratory capability is absolutely astounding. All that in about five seconds and without taking a breath…and she’s still droning on.

How I wish Gladys could remember my advice to never, ever, ever initiate a conversation with LMC! Damn Alzheimer's.

TGIF Photo Friday

2009-07-03T12:06:00.003-04:00

Since the employee issue has left me exhausted and I'd really, really, really like to leave work early today...I don't have much to say! Good thing it's Photo Friday.

Ha! I'd forgotten all about this picture! It was taken when I graduated with my masters in 2006. That look on my face? Me trying to wake up from the catotonic state caused by my thesis. I didn't even know this picture existed until last year, when someone sent me a brochure they had received from the university. That's right...I'm in the brochure! Me, a model!? I was feeling pretty good about myself until I realized the brochure is targeted toward returning adult students, or the mature student, if you will. Ouch.

(I've got them fooled.)

Happy Fourth!

HR Sucks

2009-07-02T10:35:00.005-04:00

This week I'm dealing with one mega pain-in-the-ass employee...the kind of employee who, no matter what, is never wrong. She is always the victim and it's always someone else's fault. This person lives with so much drama in her life it makes me dizzy. I've counseled her so many times....and she sits there looking at me with a blank face. She always acts shocked about whatever the topic is, always denies any wrong-doing, and usually strings together a bunch of stupid excuses that includes blaming other employees. She absolutely cannot hear what I'm saying. Sure, she hears me talking...but no listening takes place.

I really am a fair person. I always give employees the benefit of the doubt. I try to give people grace even in hard circumstances. I've had terrific bosses who have taught me the right way to coach someone how to perform better. My main goal in managing is that every employee will leave better than they came.

Unfortunately, I'm afraid that goal is unattainable with this employee. How do you get through to someone like this? Can you just tell someone that their negative energy follows them around like a black cloud? Is "passive agressive behavior" something for which you can write someone up? How do you teach someone not to talk shitty to other employees? How do you present valuable growth opportunities to someone who turns it around into being victimized, picked on, or treated unfairly? And to further complicate these questions....her actual work performance is good.

Two months ago, my regional director told me to fire this employee. Knowing her family situation, I just couldn't do it. I wanted her to have the chance to be better, to grow in her role. To save face. And now I'm having to deal with it all over again. Guess who's feeling like a big schmuck right now?

TGIF Photo Friday

2009-06-26T10:02:00.004-04:00

It's hot. I don't know if the weather is keeping everyone quiet around the Ridge or not, but there hasn't been too much going on this week. Gladys did tell me this morning that she liked my tan (which I can thank Grandma's for), and when I put my arm up against her lily-white one, she mock-gasped and said "Good grief, I'm dead and don't even know it!" She makes me belly laugh every single day.

I don't have much time (why do I schedule meetings for Fridays?) so here's all I have today, a pic of Hubby and I getting ready for some seriously good food after the marathon last weekend. Just thinking about my steaming plate of wild mushroom risotto with crab sauce and buttered asparagus makes my mouth water. If I ever decide to write another blog I think it will be about food. And eating food. And maybe wine. Mmmmm.....

Oh, and if you want to see what Nic calls the Grandma Death March face, click here. Oy. On the running front: I haven't ran this week. My feet still don't look so great--I actually have one toe that is entirely purple. It is so weird! There is a Firecracker 5K here next weekend...so hopefully the fat toes will fit into a pair of running shoes by then.

Happy Weekending!

Good Gad

2009-06-24T15:08:00.000-04:00

I showed Gladys my medal from Grandma's and told her I got it for running a marathon this weekend. "Good grief, I'll bet you were tired!" she exclaimed. She's so dang cute I want to put her in my pocket and keep her forever. "Yeah, I was pretty tired," I agreed.

"You know I used to love to run," she began. "You did?!" I quickly prompted, automatically chalking up just one more reason why I love this woman. "Oh, yes. My sister, she would stay in the house and read a book, but I would always want to go outside and run. Not for any reason, just to run. I think I thought it felt good."

"I think it feels good, too." I smiled.

"Just moving feels good," she continued. "I played basketball in school, too. Boy, I loved that." Gladys is positively tiny, and not just little old lady tiny. You can tell she's been a little person her whole life. Basketball?! I can't imagine this, and tell her so. "Oh, honey, I played all through school. I was the center." I asked her if she was taller than the other kids in her class...I just can't visualize this little wisp of a thing as the center on a basketball team (nor did I have any idea that girls even had a basketball team 75 years ago!) "No, I wasn't really taller than anyone, but I sure could jump...thanks to Mama!" Gladys says this with that ever-present twinkle in her eye.

"Your Mama taught you how to jump?" I asked.

"Oh yeah, with the gad," she laughs as she swooshes her hand back in forth in front of her. Of course I had to ask what on earth a gad was. She explained, "Mama must have called it a gad since she was Irish, but really it was just a piece of a shrub or tree and she'd swat our legs with it to teach us a lesson. I'd always start crying before she ever even swatted me, but that didn't help any. So I learned to jump, which made me a pretty good basketball player!"

I tell Gladys that it sounds as though she's been turning lemons into lemonade her entire life. "You know, I don't see much use in not being happy," she says. "Like some people around here, they sit around all day and say I wish I would die or why don't I die, well all I have to say about that is that I wish they would die already and leave the rest of us happy people alone!"

Well said, Gladys. Well said.

Grandma's Report (or "Dear Grandma: You're pretty...but mean.")

2009-06-22T22:04:00.003-04:00

We arrived in Duluth early Friday afternoon, excited and anticipating a fun weekend full of things we love the best: running, running stuff, runners, and food. Things nearly got off to a rocky start when we were informed by the nice girl at the Sheraton's registration desk that we were actually scheduled to arrive Thursday, and therefore our entire reservation had been cancelled. I laughingly made a joke about the guy in Runners World who had slept in a port-o-pot the night before a race, but Hubby didn't even crack a smile. He didn't even actually breathe until the girl came back declaring we could still have the room after all. Whew.

We got settled and walked to the Expo in an air of nostalgia. Grandma's was the first marathon I ever watched Hubby run...before we were married and before I ever considered running for any other reason than to get away from something scary. (Grandma's, although not the year I went the first time, was also the very first marathon Hubby and his brother ran...back when they called themselves the Irish Striders and raced nearly every weekend thinking they were so cool...which they probably were.) The Expo was great, although jam packed full of people. Once we made our way through all the masses we went to Grandma's for an early dinner. Most of the other diners looked as though they had just run the 5K race or were carrying race packets for the next day. The atmosphere was fun and people were wishing us good luck as they walked by our table. I love runners. They are some of the nicest people around. I really think if you took a control group of runners and measured them against a control group of non-runners, the percentage of jerks in the runner group would be far less than the non-runner group. The world needs more runners.

The ambience was terrific as we left the restaurant. Volunteers were working on the finish line, runners were taking pictures, and there were people everywhere. You could just tell this was going to be a great race. And then, the fog rolled in. Suddenly I was freezing. Which meant I also started to panic, thinking my sleeveless singlet was not going to keep me warm enough during the race. We had been watching the weather all week and there had been little change in the projected high of 62 degrees, so I didn't even bother to pack anything else. Little did I know that my worry of having the wrong attire was going to be a bad joke.

Saturday morning, we left the hotel only to discover 65ish degrees and about a million percent humidity. Long gone was the fog and chilly air from the evening before, and in its place was a magnificent, bright, and cloudless sunrise. As we walked to the bus that would take me to Two Harbors, I reminded Hubby to look for Nic. I had told him on the drive to Duluth that he was hoping for a sub-3 and to look for a bright yellow shirt with NF on the front. I also tried to relay the plaid shorts story, but it seems blog humor doesn't translate well when trying to verbally explain it...nor do I think it translated well the third time when Hubby tried explaining it to Nic's dad! Anyway, I found out later that Hubby didn't remember Nic's name, but remembered the NF, which made him strike up conversation with these people at Knife River (around the five mile mark):

How about that?! Hubby was hanging out with Nic's fan club at mile five. He even caught a pic of this guy looking fast and strong:

Speaking of mile five. By the time I got there, I was absolutely drenched in sweat, thirsty, hot, and salty. After only five miles!! I knew this wasn't good, but I was keeping pace. Between miles six and ten, all I could think of was wanting a drink. Every. Single. Step. I knew from reading my race packet the aid stations were every two miles in the first half, but this didn't keep me from looking for water at every mile mark. I even daydreamed (hallucinated?) about asking a spectator for their bottle of water so that I could fill it up at the next water stop and carry it with me. Aid stations at every two miles is typically more than adequate, but it was hot. Really, really hot. I was so hot and thirsty I couldn't quiet my mind enough to get my breathing into a rhythm, nor could I think of anything else but getting that next drink.

Somehow, I made it to the half only a minute over my desired pace. The minute might has well have been an hour, though, because mentally I had already checked out. I knew there was no way I could run the second half with an even split. It was getting hotter, there was not one merciful cloud in the sky, and absolutely no shade on this otherwise beautiful and breathtaking course.

Nothing was working for me. Not the ipod, not the mantras, not the breath counting, not the silly games where I mentally tie myself to a runner ahead of me. Nothing. And then...THEN....I see the sign that says "drop out zone." I don't have any complaints about this well organized and awesome race, but maybe they could come up with something better than "drop out zone!?" To someone who is already struggling mentally, these signs were like handing the jail keys over to the inmate and expecting him to stay locked up. After seeing that sign, I stopped to walk for the first time. I also decided for the first time ever that I was going to quit without finishing. Yup, that's what I was going to do. I was going to DNF. I started to look for Hubby, knowing he would be somewhere near the half so I could tell him I was done.

Then the inner dialogue began. "DNF??? Are you crazy? Just because you can't make it to the finish line in a time you decided was "good enough," you're just going to quit? Man, what an ego. How about you be happy that you're healthy, and that you have two strong legs that even make it possible for you to consider going 26.2 miles. How about you be a little grateful that you get to travel and meet people and run fun races and be with your husband while doing it? How about you think what running actually means to you and why you really run in the first place? Do you run because you think you can set a record by finishing in under five stupid hours? Seriously?!Who cares? Give me a break, will ya, and suck it up and do this thing. Who the hell cares what time you finish in. It's the journey, man, not the destination."

After that jacking up, what else could I do but take a deep breath and start running again?

Unfortunately, that first walk made it easier to take another walk break at mile 15. And easier yet to take another one somewhere before 17. I also started drinking Ultima because of how much I was sweating, and all the bodies sitting on the side of the road were starting to freak me out a little bit and the last thing I wanted was to be one of them. The Ultima made my tummy hurt, which then made me wish I could vomit for the next several miles. I was so happy to see Hubby at mile 19 I stopped to give him a salty kiss. I was beyond caring how long it took me to finish but also wishing it would be over soon. I saw him again at the bottom of Lemon Drop Hill, right before the 22 mile mark. I think he must have given me a boost, because I actually ran all the way up that hill! After that, I really don't remember very much other than people shouting encouragement to "smiley," which apparently was me, but why was I smiling? I have no clue. I felt used up, burned up, and my feet were starting to feel as though they had been through a meat grinder.

I do remember the 25 mile mark and thinking that all I had to do was run another mile. I couldn't even talk myself into that, and took a walk break about half way into it. Finally, at the turn that would take us the last few tenths I was able to muster up enough to run across the finish line....where they announced my name!!! I'm so glad I was coherent enough to hear it! I've never had my name announced at the finish of a marathon. Cool.

The final damage: 9 blisters caused by wet feet from running through every single sprinkler and hose on the course, a severe case of monkey butt from sweating in places one shouldn't, sunburn because the sunblock was sweated off by mile 2, and a finishing time of 5:23:20.

But I didn't quit.

***

Burned,

Blistered,
But really happy. :)

Going to Grandma's

2009-06-18T08:30:00.000-04:00

We're hitting the road at noon! We're going to stay in Madison, Wisconsin tonight (and meet up with a friend for dinner) then drive to Duluth tomorrow. Almost showtime!! I can hardly believe the spring has passed so quickly. Last night as I was trying to decide if the papercut on my thumb would affect my finishing time, I started to let my mind wander down the path of perhaps I haven't trained enough. In an effort to prove myself right and chuck the whole idea of even going to Minnesota this weekend, I looked at the running log. I have no idea when this happened, but I ran 120.7 total miles for May! That's the most miles I've EVER run in one month, and I'm at 368.4 on the year. That's almost as many as I ran in 2008 and it's only June! I hope that means I'm ready.

I also hope my knees don't hurt and that I enjoy the day, the run, the lake, the ambience and the experience. And I kinda sorta maybe hope a tiny little bit that maybe perhaps just possibly I could potentially break five hours. Whew. There, I said it. I'm putting it out there. If it's meant to be, I'll be one happy girl. If not, I'll still be one happy girl. I think I'm really going to like looking at the lake for 26 miles anyway.

Fast running vibes are coveted and I'll be back with a report on Monday.

If you have never seen this, take the time. The human spirit is amazing and inspiring. Happy Weekending!

Gladys Goodie

2009-06-17T10:25:00.004-04:00

Gladys is outside my office door, sitting in her normal chair. As I walked by to drop something in the mailbox she remarked that I always "look so perky."

"I think you're always pretty perky yourself, Gladys. That must be what keeps you so young," I reply.

"Oh, I wish I were young," she sighs.

"What would you do?" I ask, not really knowing what else to say. She hesitates for only a fraction of a second and comes up with this gem: "Much of the same things I've already done."

I love this woman! Her comment, though said casually, is certainly profound. At 92, she could be outside my office door sitting in a chair thinking about all the parts of her life she wished she could do over. Everyone has things they wish they could do over, Gladys included. What I think we forget sometimes is that those regrets are actually very few in number in the big picture, and while some regrets stick around longer than others, the most important thing is to LET IT GO at some point. If we spend a lifetime giving energy to regrets they will ultimately hold us captive....and someday we'll turn out to be the grumpy asshole at the Assisted Living that no one wants to sit with at lunch.

Instead of dwelling on her "do-overs," Gladys is sitting out there in that chair remembering everything else that has been good about her life. I think she is living proof that a positive attitude and sunny outlook will cultivate a happy life. She has Alzheimer's. She does not know what year it is. She cannot remember her roommate died.

But she is happy.

She makes me happy. Have I mentioned I love her?

View from the Ridge

2009-06-15T09:47:00.005-04:00

Friday afternoon I decided to take The Boss to lunch "in town." The Boss pointed out "in town" sounds kinda funny considering Rock Ridge is only a mile away from "in town," and "in town" consists of two decent places to eat, a bunch of used car lots, several bars, lots of churches, and one tattoo parlor. Ok, so maybe I'm exaggerating a little and "in town" isn't really that bad, but The Boss lives in a town of 100,000 compared to our roughly 13,000 (of which an enviable number attend "church" at the aforementioned bars), so I think it's safe to assume a slight cultural difference and fully give her permission to laugh heartily at my suggestion to eat lunch "in town."

With that conversation behind us, it is determined that I will drive her car. As I begin to pull out of the long drive, The Boss gasps. Not knowing the cause of her alarm, I hit the brakes thinking I have hit something and already starting to berate myself for agreeing to drive The Boss' car in the first place. As the car comes to a stop, The Boss breathlessly exclaims "Is that woman topless?"

I look out the car window. There in her yard sits Mrs. Sunbather. She does indeed appear to be topless. We've taken Old Lady Sunbathing to a whole new level here at the Ridge.

So....this morning, Mrs. Sunbather's neighbor came into the office and requested permission to erect a piece of lattice on the end of her porch....because she "needs to do something about the view."

Let the work week begin.

(Which, by the way, is a short work week because I happen to be running a marathon in five days!!!!)

TGIF Photo Friday

2009-06-12T08:26:00.004-04:00

Happy Friday! We've had the Regional Director here at the Ridge all week, so not much happening but meetings. She's still here, but how could I miss Photo Friday? Here is the first thing I found this morning: a picture of "all us grandkids," or at least those who had been born by 1975 or 76. There are 15 of us total, so there were still a few more yet to come. Any idea which one I am? (Hint: the goofiest looking one!)

This little jewel showed up on Facebook a few weeks ago. That's me when I was 15 or 16 years old, hanging by my partner's neck and touching my foot to my head. Crazy, huh?

Fast forward to June 2009. Guess what's in a week!?!?!? I've had a very easy week of running, since I've been coming to the office early and staying late it would have been hard to fit it in, but I think the rest is good. 10 miles tomorrow, a couple of short runs next week and then we're off to the races. Happy Weekending!

Day in the (Alfer) Life

2009-06-09T20:55:00.001-04:00

5:30am Alarm sounds. Roll over and go back to sleep.

5:39am Alarm sounds. Hubby says "It's 5:39, Runner Girl." I consider flipping him the bird but realize it's too dark for him to see it. Ruminate on how much DST sucks because it's still dark at 5:39am.

5:41am Groan and drag my dead butt out of bed and wonder why I run.

6:00am Meet Running Partner at the trail. Remember why I run. Smile.

8:00am Arrive at Rock Ridge. Blink headlights at apartment window of bedridden resident. Wait for him to blink his flashlight in reply. Smile.

8:15am Sing good morning to the residents eating breakfast. Consider the fact they would probably like to flip me the bird. Smile.

8:30am Worker Bee wants to "let me know" that a resident smells like poop. ???

10:00am Gladys comes the office to report her coat has been stolen. Smile.

10:47am Joseph comes to the office to find out how he can get to mass. Smile.

10:55am Gladys comes to the office to report her coat has been stolen. Smile.

11:15am WorkerBee comes to office to lodge complaint against her supervisor.

11:27am Gladys comes to the office to report her coat has been stolen. Smile.

12:00pm Mr. Lights-Are-On-But-No-One-Is-Home comes to lunch wearing his pajamas over the top of his clothes. Smile. (he's adorable)

12:01pm Mrs. Sunbather tells me in a (very loud) stage whisper that Mr. Lights-Are-On-But-No-One-Is-Home is wearing pajamas. Smile at her attempt at discretion.

12:05pm Gladys reports her coat has been stolen. Smile.

12:06pm Mr. Lights-Are-On-But-No-One-Is-Home gets up from the dining room table.

12:07pm Mrs. Sunbather tells me that Mr. Lights-Are-On-But-No-One-Is-Home has not eaten yet.

12:08pm Joseph asks how he can get to mass. TRY to smile.

12:09pm Amidst chaos (and in the dining room...ew!) another resident reports their toilet needs plunged.

12:10pm Decide I need to leave for lunch. Consider drinking my lunch. Thought makes me smile. Have a sandwich in the peace and quiet of my own home instead.

12:45pm Reluctantly leave my nice spot on the deck and drive back to Rock Ridge. Blink lights. Smile at flashlight.

1:15pm Gladys reports her coat has been stolen. Smile.

1:30pm Get stopped by Little Miss Chatterbox. Talks and talks and talks and talks. The chatter is so nonsensical I can't help but smile.

1:38pm Gladys saves me by asking where I was headed. "To get a drink," I replied. "It sounds like she's already had one," Gladys retorts, nodding her head at Little Miss Chatterbox. Smile and laugh my head off.

2:00pm Joseph comes to the office to find out about mass. Again. Smile. Again.

2:05pm Resident reminds me toilet need plunged.

2:54pm Gladys reports her coat has been stolen. Smile.

3:20pm Mrs. Torrance (I decided to call her this because her eyes looked exactly like Jack Nicholson's in The Shining!!!) comes to the office to tell me there is a conspiracy against her and that if anything happens to her that I should insist on an autopsy. She goes into great detail.

3:40pm Frantically IM Assistant to come save me.

3:43pm IM Assistant that she's fired.

3:48pm Assistant finally comes to my aid. Declares an emergency to get me out of the office and away from the crazy lady. As I walk away Mrs. Torrance shouts "dont' trust anyone!"

4:00pm Worker Bee, oh never mind.

4:30pm Resident reminds me toilet needs plunged. Consider flipping the bird...but smile instead.

5:00pm Realize that I have not accomplished one single task on to-do list, but have smiled more than most people do in a week. Consider myself lucky.

Race Update

2009-06-06T21:40:00.002-04:00

We just checked the website for Hubby's official results.....FIRST IN HIS AGE GROUP!!

He rocks.

(Hubby's) Race Report

2009-06-06T17:12:00.005-04:00

I only have one negative thing to say about today, so I'll just get it out of the way first. 6am is mighty early for a race to start! It's not often I see 4am on the alarm clock. I have no idea how people get up that dang early every day. It's inhuman.

With that being said....

Today has been a great day! We stayed in South Bend last night (because of the heinous start time) and what do you suppose happened first thing this morning as we were leaving the hotel? We ran into Laura at Absolut(ly) Fit. It was almost surreal, as I had just been telling Hubby that she was running today and he asked me if I knew what she looked like. I told him that I thought she would have on a Marathon Maniac shirt and probably a running skirt based on photos of previous races I've seen on her blog. Just a handful of minutes later, Hubby saw a girl standing at the counter of the hotel wearing the described outfit. He's sharp, that one. It was her alright, and she is as adorable in person as she is in her pictures! We introduced ourselves, I wished her luck and we were off to the start.

Hubby was more nervous than I've seen him for quite sometime. He tied his shoes seven times! I was worried he would start out too fast due to the pent-up energy and anxiety but once he lined up at the start he seemed to relax, even if just a little. I waited for the gun to go off so I could start my watch, then took off in the car for Notre Dame Stadium, where the finish line is. I met up with my running partner at the stadium and we took off on our bikes.

The marathon course was great for spectating from a bike. We were able to see him at several places and were thrilled every time to see him on pace for his desired finish. At the 15 mile mark the course made a loop, so that the 20ish mile mark was in the same place. We decided to hang out there until Hubby came back, and were able to see some other runners we knew, including Laura. I hope she had a good race...she sure looked strong at the 15 mile mark and with no signs of passing out!

When Hubby passed us again, he was still right on pace. Yay! We rode our bikes ahead and waited for him at mile 25. He had slowed a little, but still looked as good as anyone can after running 25 miles. Feeling quite sure there was no way he couldn't qualify at this point, we took off for the finish line....but he beat us there! I easily found him (he's taller than most runners, so he's pretty easy to spot in a crowd) and to say he was happy is probably an understatement! Not only did he qualify, but he did it with 18 or so minutes to spare. Just to be safe, I guess. :)

We're home now. Hubby is happy, we're going back to Boston, and all is well. (Moe! We have another AE meeting at the Lenox next April!) Now I have to go run because I have no other time to fit it in this weekend. So I'm wondering? Since I rode my bike all over the marathon course this morning, and I'm running this evening....does that mean I'm doing my first brick?!?

Foto Friday

2009-06-05T12:29:00.005-04:00

Where did the week go!? I can hardly believe it's Friday already. This week at the Ridge has been annoyingly busy, but unfortunately (or maybe fortunately?) it's been busy in a mundane kind of way, rather than a someone-put-poop-in-the-garbage-disposal kind of way.

Tomorrow Hubby runs what will hopefully be his Boston Qualifier (send good running vibes!) I'm taking my bike and plan to cheer him on at as many mile markers as possible. He's awesome, and because I think so, today's pics are all about how much fun we have.

This is us having a picnic at a park last summer. I set the timer on the camera, put it on the picnic basket, and here we are! We're such dorks, we take pictures of ourselves all the time.

A few years ago we took a bicycle trip through North Carolina, which was fantastic! I think we were on Ocracoke in this picture.

We have been going to Boston for the marathon for the past eight years. Hubby's birthday is on April 19th, which means we are always in Boston for his birthday. (Once the marathon was even ON his birthday.) Three years ago for his birthday, this wonderfully awesome and thoughtful wife actually scored some Sox tickets. The reason I'm so wonderfully awesome is because they were playing the STINKIN' YANKEES....which happens to be Hubby's favorite team (his only flaw I've found so far). I even let him wear his STINKIN' YANKEES shirt!!! (Luckily it was cold and he had to wear his jacket. Hee!) Anyway, here we are with the Green Monster.

Here we are in Chicago in 2003, the morning before my first marathon. His sister is on his left and that is a friend of ours on the far right....he had helped the three of us train and get through that first marathon. Our time was 5:55!!! His was something like 3:20. See why I think he's so awesome?

And speaking of running! My 21 miler went well. Slow, but well. Knees are feeling better and I'm starting to feel the anxiety of knowing I'm running a marathon in two weeks. 13.6 on the books for tomorrow, after Hubby qualifies of course!

Peace and happy running!

The Sunbathing Continues...

2009-06-02T14:37:00.007-04:00

I'm sitting in my office working on a report (how did it get to be June 2nd already?!?) when suddenly I detect a presence. I look up to find Mrs. Sunbather standing in front of my desk. I guess the reason I didn't hear her come in is because she is barefoot. She is also wearing a pair of sunglasses and.......

wait for it!!

One of these little numbers:

Except hers was more of a faded baby blue color with a little anchor on the leg, elastic that would fit around my jeep, and vintage, oh, about 1981, I'd say. It was also at least two sizes too small, which is just a guess based on the amount of ass cheek that was hanging out.
"I'm so embarrassed I had to come to the office dressed like this," she begins. I'm breathing deep, trying not to snicker, and mentally writing this post as the scene unfolded. "But I went outside to get some Vitamin D... just 15 minutes is all you need, you know...and I guess the door was locked when I closed it behind me and now I'm locked out and this is all I have on." As she explains her plight she is waving her arms around and I am unbelievably distracted thinking that any minute one of those 85-year-old boobs is going to pop out of the top of the stretched-out terry cloth when suddenly my preoccupied mind starts singing, because that's just how my tracks roll when it comes to ye olde train of thought.

Mammories.
If I see them I'll go blind.
Fleshy white-colored mammories
That's the way they were.

Terry cloth romper,
That should've been left behind
Barely covering wrinkled mammories
That's the way they were.

It's official. This job is making me crazy.

BQ Foto Friday

2009-05-29T09:39:00.002-04:00

I love this picture. It was taken at the finish line of the Chicago Marathon the first time Hubby qualified for Boston (maybe 2001?). He ran something like 20 marathons before he hit his qualifying time, so it was an awesome moment. Next week, he is hopefully going to qualify for next year's Boston at the Sunburst Marathon. (He missed re-qualifying in Boston last month by four minutes). Please send fast running vibes, as I'm not quite sure what I'll do with him if he misses by four minutes again.

And this....THIS....is the cutest Halloween costume EVER! (the wee one is pretty darn cute, too)

Running update: The 17.6 last weekend sucked. My knees have been killing me and it's so disappointing to actually be in shape cardiovascular-wise, but have so many aches and pains that it isn't even fun. I've been doing yoga, massage therapy, icing and anything else I can think of this week. Two slow runs this week showed definite improvement with the knee pain, so I'm hopeful I can get through the 21-miler scheduled for tomorrow. Then it's TAPER TIME!

Happy Weekend!

Holy Big Bellies, Batman

2009-05-27T13:20:00.003-04:00

She's sunbathing again, but today the 88-year-old Mr. has joined her! Picture a lot of heinously white flesh the consistency of half-set jello, flopped out for the world to see.

I'm usually glad my office has a window. Today? Not so much.

Just Spotted

2009-05-26T15:37:00.007-04:00

From time to time I like to make everyone jealous of my exciting, glamorous and ultra-cool job. I'll bet no one else today has gotten to lay eyes on an 80-something year old woman, sitting in a lawnchair in her yard wearing a pair of shorts with her shirt pulled up to her boobs. Apparently she wants to be sure she gets her daily recommended dose of Vitamin D. Am I lucky or what?

***

Little Miss Chatterbox is sitting in the lobby postulating and bemoaning that "no one around here even knows who Chad Pennington is." Um.....HUH? (I thought it was baseball season?)

Happy Tuesday!

TGIF Photo Friday

2009-05-22T09:33:00.005-04:00

I found an extra special gift for all you Gladys Groupies out there! I had completely forgotten this picture I took last summer, so what serendipity to find it this morning. Gladys is the redhead, and sitting beside her is Lois, who died this past December.

Lois is the resident who answered the door wearing underwear on her head and once called Maude an old bitch. Man, I miss her.

Speaking of Maude.... Little Miss Chatterbox followed Maude to her apartment after lunch yesterday, of course talking all the way. Apparently, Little Miss Chatterbox was trying to tell Maude she thinks her hair is a pretty color of white (it really is). Maude got to her apartment, turned around and looked Little Miss Chatterbox right in the eye... and slammed the door. Seriously, who has more fun at work than me?

Yay for the long weekend! My plans include running 17.6, playing in the garden, and drinking some wine. Have a happy!

Pick-A-Little Talk-A-Little

2009-05-20T13:21:00.006-04:00

Things are always busy around Rock Ridge, but every once in awhile it gets so hectic that I actually have to do some work. Like this morning. I had to drag my sorry (and tired) butt out of bed early enough to help serve breakfast to the inmates, which required me to arrive an entire hour before I normally do. Assistant likes to point out that I actually willingly get up earlier when I run in the mornings, but she isn't the boss and I'll complain if I want to.

I really don't have too much to complain about, though. Serving breakfast is a riot. You've got the people who forget their teeth, the people who are so hard of hearing that when you walk away from the table they talk about you SO LOUD everyone in the dining room hears it, and then you've got Little Miss Chatterbox (thanks for the perfect name, T!) As soon as I hit the front door I could hear the screechy whine of her voice. She was a constant stream of chatter the entire time I served juice and coffee. She was still talking as I started serving plates. Keep in mind, this is mindless chatter...she says absolutely nothing! Just talk, talk, talk. I was clearing plates when suddenly, I noticed....no screechy voice! What!? This woman has NOT SHUT UP since she moved in!!! And the dining room was QUIET?! Somewhat surprised, yet altogether curious I asked her table if anyone needed a refill of coffee. As she responded,* the three men at her table all burst into laughter. One of the men pointed at his watch and said "You didn't even make it five minutes!"

"Well, that was her fault," Little Miss Chatterbox exclaimed as she pointed a finger at me. "She asked me a question, I think we should start over. That was a set-up. We need to do it over. Yadda yadda yadda yadda yadda yadda yadda (there aren't enough yaddas in the world to portray this woman's oratory ability)."

Apparantly, Little Miss Chatterbox said she could be quiet for eight whole minutes, and one of the men didn't believe her and challenged her to prove it. Obviously she fell short of the goal.

As I walked away from the table, I finally heard her actually say something of content.

"Whoever is in charge here sure does a bang-up job! These girls around here are just so nice! Like that one! I don't know how they find such nice girls." Apparently she thinks I just serve breakfast. I think I'd like that.

*A Little Miss Chatterbox response is NOT a typical "yes, I would like some more coffee" or "no thank you." Instead it is more like "you know, I've heard it's good to put coffee grounds in garbage disposals. I think I should try that. Can I gets some coffee grounds from the kitchen? I used to put coffee grounds in the garden. I'd save them in a can and then put them right into the dirt. That grows beautiful flowers. You know I can't believe the peonies aren't open yet, seems like they should be since it's almost Memorial Day. I guess we're having a cookout on Memorial Day. I hope there's hotdogs. I love a good hotdog. That reminds me of when... What did you ask me?"

Foto Friday

2009-05-15T07:22:00.008-04:00

Our internet access has been down at Rock Ridge (how do they expect me to get any blogging, er, uh work done!?), so today's photos are sponsored by my home computer. Sarah, these are for you!

I live in a town that has an amateur circus, in which I began performing at the age of eight. It is an annual thing, with one week of shows every summer. I performed in various acts every summer until I was 19. I, being from a tiny midwestern town, was so worldy at the age of 19 I thought it would be a great idea to "go professional," as us amateur circus kids call performing in a "real" circus and actually being paid for putting ourselves in peril 35 feet in the air. I layed off a year from college. I performed for awhile at Knott's Berry Farm in California, and then moved to Florida and performed at Cypress Gardens. After the show in Florida folded, I performed one summer with a tent show that toured Indiana. As glamorous as that sounds, one night as I took off my elephant-stinking fishnets in the front seat of my Ford EXP as the old fryer oil from the corndog stand hung in the thick summer air I decided it would probably be a better idea to finish college. So I did. End of glamorous circus career.

These pictures are from July of 2007, when our amateur circus hosted an Alumni Show in which past (aka OLD!) performers put on the show. This is me doing Spanish Web in that show.

I'll have to see if I can find some old pics from the tent show, because that would be highly entertaining some Friday. Ah, the circus life.

Hmmm...I just contemplated this irony: my current job could be considered a circus, too...only now I'm the Ringmaster and most of my performers are sideshows! :)

Monday Nuggets

2009-05-11T14:46:00.003-04:00

We had a new resident move in last week and I don't think she's shut up since she got here. I'm not kidding, this woman defies description. Chatterbox, Mouth of the South, or even Windbag don't even come close to painting the picture. I have never in my life heard a person talk so much but say so little....I'm not sure when she breathes!! It's unbelievable. To make matters worse, she has this incredibly grating and squeaky old lady voice that reminds me of a cross between a munchkin and the witch in Snow White. It's bad. Really, really bad. Other residents avoid her and won't let her sit at their lunch table, Gladys has actually gotten up and walked away from her, and I have a headache because she's been sitting outside my office door all afternoon. I have a feeling she might be the subject of future posts....

***

Pearl isn't coming home. After the episode involving her weapons of mass destruction, she was admitted to a geriatric behavioral unit and they have informed us her dementia has progressed to the point she needs to be in a secured facility (specifically for dementia patients). I know it is what she needs, but I'm sad I won't be seeing her great big purse parked outside my office anymore. I might even miss being threatened with the meat tenderizer, too.

***

We lost a resident this morning. Obviously this is a really hard part of the job and I'm always sad when someone dies. While I feel terrible for her family, today, for her...I feel joy. This woman had been married to her husband for 70 years. They got married nine days after they met because they were so in love with each other. You could see the love they shared, by the way they looked at each other, spoke to one another, or how one would put out a steadying hand for the other. I've read articles about Broken Heart Syndrome in which spouses die in rapid succession. I believe it to be a very real thing. This resident was not ill and had no underlying medical conditions, but her husband died two weeks ago. Tragic for the family, but yet a beautiful and poetic ending to their love story. Incredible.

***

I haven't talked much about my marathon training, but it's getting down to crunch time. Today I am exactly five weeks and five days away from Grandma's Marathon. I ran a successful 21-miler on Saturday, at a pace that would make me a very happy runner on marathon day if I were able to sustain it for those last 5.2 miles. It's a strange event, though, and who knows? I'm just putting it out there that someday I hope to say I ran a marathon in four-something, because that sounds waaaaaaay faster than five-something. My IT band is aggravated again, but I'm going to yoga and stretching, stretching, stretching. I think I can limp it along.

Foto Friday

2009-05-08T09:30:00.006-04:00

A little late for Cinco de Mayo, but how ironic that this picture would be the 8th one in the 5th folder. This is my little bro and I celebrating some past Cinco de Mayo, although by my apparel one might surmise I thought it was Aloha de Mayo... or something. At least I was being festive with the uber-cool lid, but I think really I was just pissed that P.J.'s is bigger. (He has *always* been mom's favorite!!)

The folks at the Ridge have been unusually quiet this week, unless you count the lady who insists rainwater is getting underneath her house...which is causing high humidity on the inside...which is making her nose "run like a faucet," and no matter how long I talked to her she still can't seem to understand her home is built on a SLAB and there is no freaking basement, and even if there were why doesn't she just buy a dehumidifier already?

***

Gladys is having trouble with that pesky Naomi again (reminder: Naomi and Gladys were roomies, until Naomi died last year...which Gladys can't seem to remember). Gladys was in the lobby, overwrought and upset, telling Assistant and I that Naomi has been sneaking into her room while she's at lunch, laying down in Gladys' bed and having the nerve to leave withouth re-making the bed!! She is seriously worked up about this... so upset I think she might make herself stroke out, or at least vomit.

Well, this same day I had a procedure on my eye that left it really swollen and red, so Assistant teasingly tells Gladys that she'll take care of Naomi, makes a fist and punches it into her other hand. "Just look what I did to Carrie when she made me mad," Assistant said to Gladys as she pointed at my puffy eye. Instantly, Gladys goes from totally upset and wringing her hands in despair to the quick-witted little love with Alzheimer's that makes me want to take her home, and says "Hon, you better stay away from her. She beat me three times just today."

I'm continually amazed how sharp and witty Gladys can be when she can't remember Naomi is dead, has no idea what year it is, and thinks she is on vacation at a resort rather than living at an Assisted Living. She's the best.

Whole Lotta Love

2009-05-05T11:30:00.008-04:00

"I think you've probably been beautiful your whole life," 97 year-old Freddie just said to me.

"That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day," I reply.

"Well, you are beautiful," he kind of sighs before continuing, "Here I am with all this love in me and I've got no way to get it out."

***

Because I'm getting too old for sibling torture and because Teh Big Bro asked so nice, here are a couple of pics from the Mini Marathon. Unfortunately, I was so busy basking in my PR glory that I forgot I should have been capturing the moment, so this is pretty much it.

(The start kind of reminds me of a Jimmy Buffett concert, only the music isn't as good and the only questionable thing you smell is ben-gay and biofreeze.)

This is my family after the race. We had walkers, runners and some walk/runners. It was great watching everyone finish and catching up after the race. Two of my nieces also participated but are missing from the picture. They had to leave as soon as they finished because the younger niece's prom was that same night. What 17-year-old girl runs a half marathon on the day of her prom!?! MY niece does...in 2:13 no less! (No cream puff girly-girls here!)

The Greatest Spectacle in Running

2009-05-03T19:07:00.006-04:00

The One America Mini Marathon kicks off the month-long celebration of all things Indy 500. There's nothing quite like Indianapolis in the month of May, whether or not you're even an Indy Car race fan, and the Mini Marathon couldn't be a better way to get the party started. The Mini is the largest half marathon in the country, with 35,000 participants cueing up at 7:30 yesterday morning awaiting their turn at a lap on the famed Indy 500 racetrack. This was my seventh Mini, and Hubby's millionth (or something like that). Each year is just a little different, but the festive atmosphere is always the same. As we wait for the start in our corrals (there are 26 of 'em!) the local news channel is interviewing participants, John Mellencamp (he's from Indiana, ya know) is blasting from speakers, fans are packed in like sardines and hundreds of black and white checkered beach balls are volleying from runner to runner. Suddenly a strong voice can be heard over the melee...and an Indiana State Trooper is singing the obligatory "Back Home Again in Indiana" to signal it's almost race time. He isn't Jim Nabors, but he did a pretty great job all the same.

After the gun went off, it took me a little over ten minutes to get to the start line (Hubby, or Mr. Fast-Seeded-Runner as I like to call him, only took 45 seconds). It took the people in the last corral nearly 40 minutes! The start is crowded, and I have to say it's annoying to me that people lie about their estimated finish time just so they can start closer to the front and then are IN MY WAY because they are walking right from the beginning and not only are they walking but they are doing it THREE ABREAST so that it is impossible to pass. So mile one was a little hairy, but after that I found myself settling in with people at my pace...which was...remarkably...about 9:30. I decided I was going to try to maintain the pace for as many miles as possible. I didn't know how long I could keep it up, but before I knew it I was in front of the Speedway (mile six-ish) and I was still feeling strong.

Running on the track is the hardest part of the race for me. I do think it's awesome to run over the yard of bricks, and for a race fan or someone who has never been to the speedway it would probably be a great life experience. However, having been to the 500 lots of times, to the time trials even more, and drunk at Carburation Day more times than I should have been, it loses some of the luster. That's why I find running on 2.5 miles of pitched pavement with nothing but empty bleachers as scenery kinda boring. The good part of the track, however, is when you exit... all of a sudden you're at mile 9!! And for me, I was at mile 9 still running 9:30s!

I'm not sure what happened between miles 9 and 11, but somewhere out there I finally left the self doubt on the side of the road and allowed myself to believe I could actually finish a half marathon averaging less than 10 minute miles. Somewhere after 11 but before 12, I knew without any uncertainty I was running my best half marathon ever.

My IT band injury never even bothered me (amazing). I was tired, but felt good. I was running to some crazy mantra I had been repeating in my head since the track and suddenly there was Hubby, screaming my name and to "go, girl, go." I could tell he knew where I was. That was all the motivation I needed to find my last bit of energy reserve and finish hard.

Oh, how I love a PR!!! (who doesn't, right!?) Offical time: 2:06:30, which is 7:06 better than last year, and 5 minutes better than my previous PR. That's a 9:40 average pace! What a great day for this back-of-the-pack runner...and to make it even better the Mini has turned into quite the family affair. I had more than ten various family members also participating. What a blast.

Carrie
Bib 4013
Females 35-39
FiveMile 0:47:08
TenMile 1:35:55
RunnerTIME 2:06:30
GunTime 2:16:49
PACE 9:40
SEXP 3441
OVERALL 10757

Two Quickies

2009-04-30T13:10:00.005-04:00

I spent a good part of last weekend outside gardening and my arms got a little sun. Monday morning as I walked by Gladys she commented on my "beautiful tan." I'm really not very tan...however Gladys is reallllllly white (well, unless you count the pancake make-up), so I guess to her I must look pretty brown. I thanked her for the compliment, explained I had been outside all weekend and that I'm lucky that I tan easily. "I'd say you're lucky," Gladys exclaims. "You could get yourself hired as a minority."

****

This day is insanely busy, hence the quickies. I've been through the lobby at least a hundred billion times. Gladys has been sitting out there, watching me go back and forth. "You sure have a lot cookin' today," she exclaimed. "I sure do, Gladys! I can't believe how busy this place is today. I wish I could sneak out. " Gladys says I SHOULD sneak out. "Ok, then when someone comes looking for me you just tell them you haven't seen me, ok?"

"Nope. I'll tell them you're out laying in the bars."

She slays me.

Weekend Update

2009-04-26T22:52:00.003-04:00

I ran another 5K yesterday. It was a race put on by a local hospital where my sister-in-law works and she was the head of the planning committee. We wanted to be there to support her, so Hubby even pulled out a pretty quick race although he ran Boston five days ago! I didn't run as fast as I did last weekend, mainly because my nieces were running and one of them was having a little trouble. She went out too fast, so when I caught her she was holding her side and not feeling so hot. I stuck with her trying to help her through the side stitch. Running with her made the race that much more fun, as I don't often have the opportunity to run with my 17-year old niece. Later, I was thinking that I should have just run my race because I started out thinking it would be easy to get another PR since it was such a small race (how fun would that have been to post two PRs in two weeks?) But...who cares? My niece will be going to college before I know it, and she is definitely one of my lights. What could have been more important at that moment than running with her? Nothing, and I loved every 29 minutes and 30 seconds of it.

Today I went 10.2. Notice I didn't say today I "ran" 10.2, simply because I was a BIG WEINER and had to walk. It was so hot that at one point I thought it was raining because I felt raindrops on my arms only to realize it was the sweat dripping off my head. It also didn't help that I worked in the garden all day yesterday and my glutes were killing me from all the squatting, my mental focus was terrible, and after about three miles I realized this was the third day in the row I was running and I never run three days in a row. Lots of mental chatter and bad self talk ensued. I believe this is officially the worst run I've ever had. Period.

Next Saturday is the One America Mini Marathon, where I ran a half-marathon PR last year (which I ended up besting three weeks later at Notre Dame). Obviously I would love to PR again, but after today's run who knows. It all comes down to how you feel on that day. Hopefully I'll feel fast!

TGIF Photo Friday

2009-04-24T13:49:00.006-04:00

Quick! Name something found under Pearl's bed.

If you guessed any of these items, you're a winner!

After I snapped that pic, I realized the hammer was missing from the pile.

So was this:

(All items have been confiscated. I have the most interesting desk drawer.)

Happy Weekending! :)

Love those Dirty Waters

2009-04-22T17:20:00.013-04:00

How I love Boston! I love the food. I love the places to go and the things to do. I love the food. I love the T. I love the people watching. I love the food. I love how everyone says "Bahstin" and "wicked good" and that they sing Sweet Caroline at Fenway. But most of all, I love the food. No, just kidding....most of all, I love the Boston Marathon.

I'm sure it's easier for me to say I love the marathon because I've never had (and never will have) the opportunity to torture myself on hill after hill from Hopkinton to Boylston Street, but being in Boston during marathon weekend is amazing. That city absolutely comes alive for this race. The atmosphere of the city is incredible, and the support of the marathon runners is unlike anywhere else we've ever been. This is the seventh time Hubby has run Boston, and every year I feel the same way. It's incredible.

Friday we flew out on such an early flight it shouldn't have been legal, so we were in Boston early enough for breakfast. We went to one of our favorite breakfast spots on Newbury, traipsed along checking out Niketown, people, and the flagship Life Is Good store until we had wasted enough time to go to the Expo. I always enjoy the Expo...but this year I got to pick up a packet and a race shirt, too! (Any race that lets you try on your shirt to be sure it fits = awesome. I have more race shirts that don't fit than Carter has liver pills....whoever Carter is...)

The Expo was fun and great. We saw Bart Yasso and Frank Shorter and met Kathrine Switzer who was putting the hard sell on us to buy her book, but my favorite part of Friday came later as we were walking back to our hotel and we ran into her on Boylston Street:

Kara Goucher is a class act. She was so nice, down-to-earth and personable. She even asked Hubby if he had any course tips for her since he'd run it before!

Sunday was the 5K and just like you could expect from a BAA race, it was the best race I've ever run. It was a bit too crowded to run very fast at the start, but other than that it was fantastic. Running through the streets of Boston and finishing on Boylston at the marathon finish line was just damn cool! All the finishers got medals, they announced names at the finish line, and the snacks were great. Oh yeah, and I got that PR. 27:55, a flat 9-minute mile pace. Yippee! :)

Monday was a blast. I walked Hubby to the Common and waited with him until he boarded the bus for Hopkinton. About 10am my cousin (who lives in Cambridge) met me and we took the T to the 16.8 mile mark in time to see the elites racing. Amazing! After they ran by, we passed the time cheering and clapping and anxiously awaiting Hubby. All of a sudden he was there! He looked great and threw us his gloves and some kisses. I tried to get a picture of him, but I was too excited....so here's my cousin while we were waiting for him. Isn't she adorable!? We had so much fun.

As soon as he passed us at that stop, we took off to the T and made it to Cleveland Circle (about 21.5 mile mark) with about ten minutes to spare. He still looked great, even though he had just come off of Heartbreak Hill. After he passed, we ran back to the T and were lucky enough to have a train waiting, so we made it to Commonwealth Ave just in time to watch him turn on Hereford. His gait had changed considerably and he looked exhausted, but he was still smiling and blowing kisses. He's the one in green (with his head blocked by the tree branch!):

Afterwards, we met in the Public Garden. I think he looks tired, but happy!

Of course as the evening passed, he couldn 't help but dwell just a tiny bit on having missed re-qualifying by 4:02. He has already started checking out fall marathon options to remedy that.

Has anyone ever run Philadelphia or Richmond? Sounds like we get to go on another trip....

Monday

2009-04-13T15:28:00.005-04:00

Today I went to viewing #3. The son of the deceased is the tummy toucher, and when I spoke to him he never made eye contact with me....because he kept looking at what appeared to be my chest region. I thought he was looking at the ugly red chafe mark I got from my running bra during my 15-miler, but Assistant says not so much. What the heck is that?!? Besides creepy, weird, and inappropriate?? People are so weird.

Anyway! I'm glad the viewings and general sadness are over. I'm looking forward to a much better week....which includes leaving for Boston on Friday. YAY! Hubby ran his last long one on Saturday, so besides his normal Boston Marathon jitters that he gets this time every year, he's ready. (Speaking of Hubby....I got mail today in his name but with my office address. How bizarre.) The weather for marathon day is supposed to be decent, but it looks like rain the day of the 5K. Oh well, I don't care if it's pouring. I'm running a 5K PR across the Boston Marathon finish line! (I'm hearing Big & Rich saying "can I get an Amen-ah")

Some Resident Nuggets:
*Gladys had a birthday. When I told her happy birthday she said she couldn't believe she was 92 and I couldn't believe she remembered she was 92! She looks incredible for her age and I told her so. She said she figures she looks young because she always stayed active. "What did you do?" I asked, thinking how cool it would be to find out she had been a runner. With that ever-present twinkle in her eye and an even voice, Gladys replied "Oh, the normal. You know, beating the tar out of boys."

*WorkerBee made Pearl's bed for her and found a hammer under the pillow. (now I'm hearing the Beatles ... "Bang, Bang, Pearl's silver hammer came down upon her head....")

*Apparently Mr.-Reminds-Me-of-a-Tim-Conway-Character, who moved in last Friday, was finding it difficult to access his mail box. All I overheard was "how in the hell does this son-of-a-bitchin' thing work?"

Nothing makes me laugh like a 90-year old with a potty mouth.

Thursday

2009-04-09T20:18:00.002-04:00

You people are amazing. Haley, Sarah, and Carolina John, thank you for the hugs. Your virtual hugs managed to make me feel as good as the real ones I got from all the residents yesterday. Erik, Chirunner, and Diana, thank you for your kind words and encouragement. This support system called blogging is simply amazing. Glaven...you have such a gift with words. I still want to be your little sister (unless of course you were the kind that tortured your siblings...) And Marna Marie....I miss you terribly.

So thank you, everyone. Really. Because today went better than it would have without all of you out there sending good energy my way. Marie died this morning. I did everything I have to do when someone dies, a routine that is feeling a bit too familiar with this being the third death in five days. I gave the family lots of hugs and support, and then I did the only other thing I could think to do. I went for a run. For three hours.

I feel better.

Oh! I almost forgot. The sheriff never came because Pearl found her costume jewelry. This isn't because she had misplaced it in the first place, but because whoever robbed her snuck back into her apartment and put it back. Because robbers do that you know.

And she's back

2009-04-08T17:04:00.004-04:00

Better late than never? I did make it to the half marathon on March 28th. I ran 2:26:01 (11:09 pace). It was cold and windy. I should have posted a race report, but I didn't feel like it. Still don't, really.

I've been in a bad spot. The kind of spot where you feel like talking to no one and doing nothing. This is a hard thing for me...the eternal optimist, the glass half-full girl, the person everyone in my college sociology class called Pollyanna. I should be able to adjust my rose-colored glasses and move on, but instead, not being able to talk myself out of a funk just makes it worse.

It is amazing that the things most likely to help me work through sad stuff are the last things I feel like doing....when I need it most. Soooo. Trying to dig out of the hole here... I made myself do yoga for an hour last night. I made myself read a chapter in the book "Broken Open." I hugged every single resident today. I'm making myself write.

I can't even think what to write about or why I'm in such a funk. There really isn't any one reason. I guess it's just a lot of little things like the phone ringing at 4am, crappy families not taking care of their elders, and missing my sister. Usually the little things don't add up to one bad sad scary Carrie, but sometimes I don't let my coping skills do their job. I stop letting things go and just keep piling it on. Why do I do that? I've read the books. I know better.

So, here's what I think the deal is. I already have this precarious pile of shit I've refused to let go of for some unknown reason....and then people start dying. I know I work with old people and that they are going to die. But knowing that doesn't make me miss them any less when they are gone. And no matter what, you are never, ever, ever ready to walk into someone's apartment and find them dead on the floor. And having to tell their family? Yeah, well, they don't teach you how to do that in Assisted Living 101.

Lucy died, too. I'm happy for her, because she was ready...but, I already miss hearing her gravely voice. We have another resident on hospice and they've called her family to be with her tonight, so tomorrow probably won't be very happy, either. (At least that will be the magic number three everyone here keeps yakking about.)

But, the more things change the more they stay the same! As I am sitting here writing this, Pearl came in to let me know she was robbed last night. If I don't do something about finding her 15 dollars and costume jewelry, she's calling the sheriff first thing in the morning. Aha!!
Things are getting back to normal....

Not my Jovial Self

2009-03-27T18:37:00.008-04:00

I have a confession to make. While the occasional flying fork makes pretty funny dinner conversation, and knowing and loving Gladys is one of my life's greatest pleasures....the Alfer Life isn't always shits and giggles.

Sometimes it flat out sucks.

It flat out sucks when someone has rheumatoid arthritis so crippling that all she can do is moan...or even worse....cry if someone tries to move her. It flat out sucks when my 102 year old has to stay at the nursing home because the heart attack that should have killed her didn't (and trust me, she's pissed about it).

And selfishly....did I mention SELFISHLY? It flat out sucks when someone falls in the middle of the night and I'm the only one who can go help. I like to sleep!! And when the phone rings at 3:54 a.m.....well, as I said, it flat out sucks. The ugly self-talk that follows my poor reaction pretty much sucks, too. No one is meaner to me than me. After I spent an hour holding the hand of an 88 -year old resident with the worst skin tear I've ever seen (I could actually see the fat under the skin, and it ended up taking 17 stitches to put her back together) all I could do is berate myself for being annoyed that my slumber had been interrupted. What could have been more important than being with and comforting someone in pain? NOTHING. Yet, I was annoyed that I had to drag my selfish ass out of bed and drive the 2.2 miles from my cozy, warm bed to Rock Ridge at the ungodly hour of 4am.

Current Status:
The bad:
I'm exhausted. (Did I mention the phone rang at 3:54 in the freaking morning?)
I'm racing tomorrow.
The weather forecast is lousy.
My IT band is killing me.
I wish I wasn't going.

The good:
I spent an hour this morning learning things about a resident I never would have known had I not had the opportunity to sit with her.
I've had two glasses of wine.
My TrueLove (aka hubby) is making me cheese crackers as I type.
It's Friday.
I'm racing tomorrow.

Oh, and this Foto Friday picture:

This is my "Grammie D," Ellie D'Ambrosio. This picture was taken last December in Boston. She died in January.

I do miss her...but I visited her faithfully at least once a year from the time I was able to scratch together enough dough for a plane ticket, up until she was diagnosed with the lung disease.

We were all good.

What more could you ask for?

Running Review

2009-03-22T20:43:00.006-04:00

I hope I don't jinx anything by saying it appears the dreaded treadmill season is over! Thank goodness, as I was starting to have doubts about running a spring marathon. Anyway, it was 65 glorious degrees here today...perfect for a 10.2 mile run. I also did 6.8 on Tuesday and a quick 2.2 speed/hill work out on Thursday. Not quite 20 miles this week, but that's ok since I'm racing a half next weekend.

My pace this week consistently hovered between 10:40 and 11 minute miles. I'm always a slow runner, but usually not quite that slow. I'm not sure what that is...maybe just getting used to being outside again? I'm also struggling with a tight IT band. Again. That's such a bummer, because I felt certain taking two months off after the Portland Marathon would help straighten that sucker out. I guess maybe I should have kept going to yoga, or at least been a good stretcher at home (I wasn't.)

That's the update from here!

TGIF

2009-03-20T08:49:00.007-04:00

YAHOOOOOO, it's Friday!

So far in the hour I have been here today, I've been asked to fix broken dentures (uh, gross!), the slippers have shown back up (she's still trying to figure out the holes three months later!), Joseph is desperately searching for his wife (who died ten years ago), and Gladys is mad as hell at the "quack" who sold her the new glasses that makes everything look blurry. She thinks I'm crazy when I tell her it takes a couple days to get used to new lenses and claims she is going to get her old glasses back "if I have to walk to the junction and get them myself!" It's shaping up to be another awesome day here at the Ridge! :)

Onto Foto Friday! Copying the logic of so many other great bloggers, here is my third folder, 20th picture:

I took this picture out the front door of Rock Ridge about a month ago. A rainbow in February is a pretty unusual site around here, and this was probably the brightest rainbow I've ever seen. It was such a random moment of joy for all of us...residents and staff...young and old alike. It was fun to stand in the door and marvel nature together. As we were standing there beholding, a second, much lighter rainbow started to appear. If you look really close you can see it to the left of (or above) the bright one in this picture. Awesome!

(And isn't that little white jeep the cutest? I can hardly wait to take the top off.)

Enjoy Friday!

Top O' the Day

2009-03-17T13:38:00.006-04:00

Gladys is celebrating her Irish roots today by wearing one of these around her neck:

Apparently she couldn't find anything else green.

Happy St. Patrick's Day!

Updates

2009-03-16T12:11:00.000-04:00

Last week Rock Ridge hosted our company's regional training, so we had ten people from all over the US hanging out with us and enjoying all that our small town has to offer, which isn't a whole lot. Hosting is exhausting, and mega time consuming, but the upside was the valuable training and the reaffirmation that I work for an incredible company. It's awesome to spend time with such positive, uplifting, and creative people....all of whom really love old people.

Everyone also claims this industry has been (and will remain) unaffected by the state of our economy. I have to wonder how that is possible, but that's what the experts are saying...so I'm going with it.

In Resident news: My little 102 year old had a heart attack. She wouldn't get out of bed and told the WorkerBee to "go away and leave me alone so I can die today." Well, she didn't die...quite the contrary. She's recovering quite nicely and should be home soon. Incredible.

Gladys claims some shyster came to Rock Ridge and took her picture, charged her $75 for the photo, and never delivered it. I'm guessing something like this actually happened to her at some point in her life, but it totally cracks me up to hear that little sweetie use the word shyster like it's the queen mother of all dirty words.

Maude threw a WorkerBee out of her apartment over the weekend. Maude's family has asked that we give her assistance with bathing, but apparently Maude disagrees that she needs help. She told WorkerBee "I'm getting ready to turn 98 years old! Don't you think I know how to have a bath!?" She has a point.

In Running News: Even with all the company we had last week, I still managed to have a 24-mile week, with half of that mileage coming from a 12-miler on Saturday. The weather looks as though it will be cooperative for some nice runs this week, too. I spontaneously registered for a half marathon on the 28th (Hubby always runs it as a Boston trainer), it's a tiny little race...but should be a great training opportunity. I'm excited about the possibility of this race helping my performance at the Mini on May 2. I've never run a half before the Mini, so I'm hoping it speeds me up a bit. I'd sure love a PR....

That's all!

Boston Excitement

2009-03-05T21:06:00.007-05:00

The BAA is hosting its first-ever Boston Marathon Weekend 5K....and I'M IN!!!!!! So, why is this exciting? Let me count the ways....

1) How about because it finishes on Boylston at the marathon finish line?? HOW COOL IS THAT? Ok, so not as cool as crossing that same finish line after 26.2, but for a runner like me, this is the only way I could ever run across the Boston Marathon finish line at all.

2) Part of the 5K course runs the same course as the women's olympic marathon trials last year, which Hubby and I were so lucky to get to watch on the Sunday before the '08 marathon. I think there is something reverent about running the same streets as Joan Benoit Samuelson, not to mention the best women marathoners in our country.

3) I'm running a race. In Boston. The day before the oldest marathon in history.

4) I should run a PR. This is simply because I have only ever run one other timed 5K, and I'm thinking the excitement of running on Commonwealth, turning onto Hereford to finish on Boylston Street is pretty much going to carry me faster than a stinkin' 29 minutes, which is the time of my only other 5K.

5) I will actually be running a race all by myself with Hubby as my fan! This NEVER happens. Because we both run, we're usually both, well running. He's running the marathon on Monday, so had no interest in the Sunday 5K. (Pussy.)

6) Have I mentioned finishing on Boylston Street? At the marathon finish??? As if that isn't enough awesomeness, the finish is only a handful of blocks away from my most favorite breakfast spot ever. There will be a plate of lemon ricotta stuffed challah bread french toast with my name on it. And don't even think about forgetting the blueberry coulis topping. (and for once, I'll have actually burned a few calories before consuming a bajillion)

I am totally thrilled to be a participant in the Inaugaral BAA 5k, and have already started to interject things like "I sure hope I'm ready for Boston in April" into my daily conversations. You know, just to sound cool.

Overheard

2009-03-03T07:43:00.002-05:00

I was helping get the breakfast service started when two male residents walked in together, exchanging morning niceties. Suddenly one of them stopped short and said, "Oh crap! I forgot my teeth."

TGIF Foto Fun

2009-02-27T18:45:00.004-05:00

Adventure Seeker has declared a theme for this week's T.G.I.F. Foto Friday. Her instructions:

America's Next Top Runner

Be creative, think outside the box, go crazy.

So in the spirit of "going crazy" here is the difference between a 163- pound run/walker/hacker and a 132-pound "real" runner. Viewer discretion advised.

January 2007, during the marathon portion of the Goofy Challenge at Disney World. Chubba Chubba!

(Don't I look about ready to POP? I'm not sure how I even did that marathon. This is more embarrasing than I imagined.)

In May 2008, I PR'd at the Sunburst half marathon, finishing in Notre Dame Stadium. It was really awesome to run that fast (for me) and not start a fire by my thighs rubbing together.

Peace and smaller thighs, all.

Weebles What?

2009-02-26T11:58:00.001-05:00

Disclaimer: I'm not usually this mean about unfortunate occurences involving my residents. (But damn, does this guy ever deserve it!)

Whoever said weebles wobble but they don't fall down was wrong, because it turns out that they DO fall down. Well, at least the human version does. A better slogan in this particular case would be weebles wobble but they can't get back up.

Remember Righteous Resident? If not, you really should read this post as it provides a somewhat amusing illustration of his character. He is also the resident who once gave me a 30-minute sermon about how the Bible says sodomy and homosexuality are sins and when I retorted with "The Bible also says Judge Not" when he began using derogatory slurs he got all red-faced and pissed and I actually thought he might have a stroke. OH, and speaking of derogatory slurs...how could I forget overhearing him use the "N" word when telling another resident that his daughter has biracial children. Class act, this guy.

Righteous Resident resembles a weeble more than any human being I've ever seen. I swear he is shaped almost exactly like this picture only much, much bigger. (Did I mention MUCH bigger?) He bulges from his neck to his feet. I've never seen anyone shaped quite like this. It's an amazing thing to behold.

Well, apparently Righteous Resident had a mishap in which he ended up on the ground outside his apartment. He was carrying two dozen eggs, which upon first whiff one could surmise were well past the use-by date (unrelated to the story yet amusing none-the-less). Since he was actually outside at the time of the incident, his emergency button would not work. Knowing that he had to get to the building before he could alert someone, he did the only thing a human weeble could. He rolled. All the way to the door.

Now, I understand this may not seem so funny, especially considering he could have been hurt. But he wasn't hurt! And when you consider the fact that this life-sized weeble would first have to get a "running start" to even roll over once, you can't help but snicker. C'mon! Admit it! Just picture this humongous weeble rocking back and forth (like a car with bald tires trying to get unstuck from the mud) just to roll over once... only to discover that he needs to repeat this action over and over and over to get to the door. That's funny. I don't care who ya are.

Am I just lucky...

2009-02-24T17:32:00.005-05:00

or does anyone else find notes like this on their desk:

Weekend Update

2009-02-22T22:42:00.003-05:00

Winter is back, and after that little preview of spring weather let me just say it realllllllllllly sucks. More ice and snow prevented outdoor running, not to mention it might have been hard to find time to go anyway considering the amount of strangeness at Rock Ridge this week.

Strangeness = Lots o' hours.

Anyway.

I ran on the treadmill twice. 3 miles at 10 minute-mile pace on Wednesday. And then today, TODAY.....I ran SIX MILES!! Yup, I actually ran six freaking miles on the treadmill in 62 minutes. I know this doesn't seem like that great of an accomplishment, but considering my unreasonable treadmill-hate, it sure is for me. Small victories. That's what it's all about, right?

TGIF and Why I'm MIA

2009-02-20T17:43:00.000-05:00

This week at the Ridge we've had pneumonia, suspended employees, stinky residents, stolen coats (that damn Naomi), the police, a resident thrown out of the courthouse, phone calls waking me up at midnight, a confused resident walking into the wrong apartments, and a power surge resulting in about 15K worth of damaged electrical equipment. I'm exhausted. And so ready for a drink. Or ten.

On to Friday Foto Fun. No science was used in the choosing of this photograph. I opened a file and clicked wherever the cursor already was. So here I am! That's me with a full belly of awesome sushi. Shino's is a tiny sushi bar (really tiny...I think there were like eight or ten seats in there) on Newbury Street in Boston. I am holding a Marathon Sports bag...I did a little shopping before the sushi treat! I love Boston, and we go often because my family is there. We also go every April because my husband rocks and qualifies to run the marathon. I've gotten quite adept at being the ultimate Boston Marathon fan using the T (Boston's subway system) and some leg power, so if anyone ever needs advice on how to maximize the number of spectating spots, just let me know!

Peace, all.

The Eye of the Beholder

2009-02-17T20:57:00.005-05:00

"You need to have your eyes checked," Gladys exclaimed in response to me telling her she was beautiful. "You're crazy! This face is old and wrinkled," she complained.

"Your face isn't where you're the most beautiful, anyway," I told her as I patted my heart.

"Well, I'd say it takes one to know one!" she retorted without skipping a beat.

Weekend Update

2009-02-15T16:40:00.004-05:00

Thank you Hoosier weather gods. 50 degree temps at the beginning of the week yielded a three-miler (30:47), a four-miler (forgot my watch, but it felt great!) and enough melted snow to actually go five miles on Friday even though the temperature had dropped back down into the 20s. Take that, treadmill!

Since I totally missed Foto Friday, here are some pictures of where I had my big 12-mile week. The trail is a Rails to Trails project and it is incredible. This past summer it was expanded to 13 miles one way, with plans for further expansion this season. There are waterfalls, fields, wildlife, all types of trees and birds...it is absolutely peaceful and beautiful...the perfect place to get all Zen and remember why you like to run.

The Case of the Missing Money

2009-02-12T08:45:00.009-05:00

A few of weeks ago when I tried balancing the petty cash, I kept coming up $225.49 short. I spent the majority of a day trying to figure it out...racking my brain, looking for receipts, and interviewing WorkerBees with access to the cash box. Anything I could possibly think of to investigate all lead to dead ends. In despair, I called the home office to report the shortage.

"Just send the receipts you do have and don't worry about it," said A.P. Lady. Don't worry about it?!?!?! $225.49 simply vanished and I don't worry about it?? My petty cash balances every single month. To. The. Penny. ALWAYS. "Sometimes it will just turn up," she replied. How can $225.49 "just turn up?!?" I'm incredulous, but also a little relieved that I don't have to figure out who to fire over the missing money. A.P. Lady suggested I leave it for a few days and go back to it, thinking I had overlooked something.

I knew I hadn't overlooked anything...I spent way to much time trying to figure it out, but I accepted her advice and let it go. The money never showed up.

Until yesterday. Some background info: When I balance our petty cash receipts, I send the receipts to the home office and they cut a check for the amount of the receipts. The check is made out to me personally, so that I can cash it and replenish the petty cash box. The system works well...usually.

Late yesterday afternoon, Joseph's son knocked on my door. He had a stack of mail. The envelopes had already been sliced open with a letter opener. "I found these in Dad's drawer," said Son. I was incredulous, as I recognized the mail and knew I had been the one who opened it...on about January 15th! Apparently Joseph had picked the mail up off my desk while I wasn't in the office, took it back to his apartment with him and put it away for safe-keeping! I suppose he thought it was his (he does think I'm the church secretary).

As I sifted through the envelopes, suddenly the Case of the Missing Money was solved. Stuck in-between two envelopes was a petty cash reimbursement check. I guess A.P. Lady was right....sometimes money does show back up....but in a million years I couldn't have figured this one out!

So I'm happy the mystery is solved...but...I'm ticked that the check was only for $225.48.

So much for my record.

Weekend Update

2009-02-08T11:45:00.007-05:00

Where else other than the midwest can the temperature be in single digits one day and FIFTY-TWO the next?? That's right, 52 delicious degrees! I actually ran outside yesterday...with NO jacket! Four miles of bliss while listening to the crackle and drip of melting snow and ice while actually having fun resulted in a 10:30 pace and a very satisfied and happy Carrie.

Unfortunately, the whole week didn't go quite that well. I didn't run at all. I was so busy I couldn't find the time to fit it in. Excuse? Probably. I really was insanely busy, but it was still blistering cold....so giving up a run on the treadmill just came a little too easy. I am still struggling with the treadmill, however, I do think the run outdoors gave me some motivation back. Thank goodness, because I have somehow found myself registered for a marathon in June.

In other news this week: Things at the Ridge are crazy as we are trying to prepare for a visit from our Home Office bigwigs in three weeks. I'm trying to figure out how to keep Pearl from reporting her entire apartment missing, while making sure Maude doesn't throw anything....not to mention the challenge of what to do with Naomi. According to Gladys, she's been at it hardcore again this week, stealing everything from make-up to bras to bed sheets. I think I have my work cut out for me.

Three Quickies

2009-02-03T12:11:00.004-05:00

Lucy turned 102 on Sunday. How amazing is that? To celebrate, apparently, she came walking out of her bathroom with a handful of poo. She showed it to WorkerBee and said "It's the real thing!"
***
We have two residents who have become good friends. Marie is 90 and Max is 87. Marie has been ill lately, so Max has been visiting her at her apartment (gasp). Evidently she has a case of halitosis, because after Max gave her a smooch he told WorkerBee that she needed to do something about Marie's breath.
***
We had a luau last week to try and chase away the winter blues that seem to have settled over Rock Ridge. Early in the day I reminded Gladys about the party. "I better go home and dig up my grass skirt," she replied. I told her not to forget the coconut bra. She looked confused for a split second, then grabbed the front of her shirt in the chest region and pulled it out. "Well, I'd need the coconuts to go with it if you know what I mean!"
She is hysterical.
***
Happy Tuesday!

I'm Alive

2009-01-31T14:52:00.004-05:00

Barely. It took four days to get over whatever ugly bug decided to take up residence in my digestive system. Bright side: 3.5 pound weight loss. Down side: I've never been that sick. Ever. But I'm better. Thank goodness.

Now I have out of town company, so not much time to post. Gladys was in fine form this week, so I'll be back soon. In the meantime, here's my TGIF foto fun. Late, as usual. This is what I look like upon finishing the hardest marathon I've ever run, which isn't unlike how I look after four days of gastric distress. Not. Good.

Weekend Update

2009-01-25T14:51:00.003-05:00

This post is coming live from my living room where my pathetic self is slabbed out on the couch from which I have not moved in two days. I didn't eat any peanut butter, but I may as well have. The upside: I discovered at least two things I hate more than the treadmill. And both involve the untraditional use of a toilet.

Moving on to a better subject...

The treadmill and I sorta made up! On Monday, I ran 35 non-stop minutes varying between 12 minute and 10 minute mile pace. It certainly won't set any records, but this felt like a great accomplishment considering I ended up walking the past several times I attempted to run on the treadmill. On Wednesday, with the help of some John Bon Jovi eye candy (you all were right about the TV) I ran 30 minutes, but this time I stayed on 10 minute mile pace the entire run.

I still don't love the treadmill yet, but I made myself have a better outlook about it. And I was yet again reminded that attitude really is everything when the universe rewarded my new found anti-antagonistic attitude. The sun came out Thursday, the temperature made it all the way up to 39 degrees, and I RAN OUTSIDE! It was only three miles, but I enjoyed every step.

My plan for this week includes at least three runs (no pun intended), however I will first have to pry myself off this couch.

TGIF

2009-01-23T12:49:00.007-05:00

This is a special treat for all you groupies out there! Today's Foto Friday is brought to you by Gladys herself. (She's the redhead!)

Today she says Naomi has stolen all of her make-up. She came into my office and said "That woman has a screw loose! Why would anyone steal such a thing as make-up? When she married that husband of hers, she went to pot!" She makes me laugh every single day.

She is a really big reason why I love my job.

Meeting of the Minds

2009-01-22T09:34:00.008-05:00

Last week we had a Resident Council Meeting. These are a big deal with much talk and preamble leading up to meeting day. Typically, this is a meeting where all the residents attend and then bitch, er I mean, talk about everything that is wrong and needs fixed around this dump. Needless to say, I was dreading this meeting as much as I do the treadmill.

As it turns out, the dread was most unnecessary and the meeting was amazing! This resident council meeting was 1000% different than any other Resident Council Meeting in the history of Rock Ridge. At this meeting, after they did all their cute Robert's Rules of Order stuff and opened the floor for commentary, residents actually stood up and said what the liked about Rock Ridge! They talked about everything that was going right! The consensus was that things couldn't be better! One resident even teared up while talking about how he feels he doesn't deserve to be treated so well and how much he loves everyone here. It was such a positive meeting, that the lone complainer had even changed his attitude before he was finished trying to complain, and I don't think he even realized it! This was such a cool thing to witness, considering the extremely negative history of past council meetings. Actually, it was pretty damn awesome.

The Good: Assistant says I'm the one who has set the tone and helped make this a more positive place to work and live. While I do not believe that this is the case, (it takes a strong team of a lot of positive people to turn negativity around) it was still a wonderful compliment that made me feel good.

The Bad: During the meeting, one resident stood and read the names of all the residents who have died, as a sort of memorial. It was a nice tribute, but I think it made everyone feel a little melancholy. There were so many names...more than we let ourselves remember on a daily basis.

The Inevitable: When Naomi's* name was read, Gladys sat up straight in her chair, gasped audibly, and loudly exclaimed "Naomi Lastname certainly IS NOT dead!" Then she slumped back in her chair and muttered under her breath "She just wants everyone to think she is."

God, I love her.

I'll take your Nixon and raise you a Roosevelt!

2009-01-20T21:37:00.008-05:00

Today at the Ridge we served lunch as usual, but set up a borrowed big-screen TV in the dining room so the residents (and staff) could watch the historic inaugaration of our 44th president. As we listened to the oaths and speeches, I was uncertain what to expect. It is no secret these elders are from an era where equality was unheard of and prejudices were not only accepted, but expected.

But as I looked around the room at wrinkled face after wrinkled face cupping their hands to their ears so as to hear every word spoken by our new president, I could tell none of that mattered. They were proud. Proud to live in a country where anything is possible, and proud to have lived so long to have witnessed not just this historic event, but so many others that came before it.

Our oldest resident was born during President Roosevelt's second term. TEDDY Roosevelt's second term. Isn't that just incredible?!? My grandmother (who also happens to be a resident at Rock Ridge...I'm so blessed) witnessed her 17th presidential inaugaration today, with the first being Woodrow Wilson's. Just think of the life experience they have! Although I live with the wisdom and experiences (and shenanigans!) of these seniors every day, I rarely take the opportunity to reflect on that. I'm grateful I was able to today. (It also made me feel like an infant that Nixon was president when I was born. Seriously. How does he compare to TEDDY frickin' ROOSEVELT!?!)

And just to prove my concern of intolerance was way off the mark, one 94-year-old sweetheart leaned over toward me as she gazed at President Obama on the big screen and said "He sure is a handsome man, isn't he?"

Weekend Update

2009-01-18T12:22:00.002-05:00

Work was insane this week. I have stories but somehow don't feel like writing about them yet. Someone died this week, too, which is probably why I don't feel like it. That part of the job really sucks.

SO. Moving on. I've decided weekend posts will be about my running (or lack thereof) . I need the (perceived) accountability right now because I seem to be lacking a little in the motivation department. I signed up for a marathon this week and then only ran ONE TIME! I have to get over my antagonistic relationship with the treadmill. The temperature ranged from -18 to about +7 this whole week, and there is 6-7 inches of snow and ice on the ground. There is no way I can run outside. I have to figure out how to make treadmill running work for me.

The dumbest thing about despising the treadmill is that I don't even know why! Yes, it's hot. Yes, it's pretty boring. But other than that I can't even think of a real reason WHY I hate it so much. Maybe that whole weird exposed tummy episode caused enough mental anguish that I've subconsciously transferred the horror into treadmill hate?! Yeah. Probably not. I've never been too big on making excuses....so this week I'm going to try and change my outlook. I'm going to be grateful I have a treamill to run on. I'm going to be happy that I have strong legs and can even run in the first place...and then I'm going to run on that treadmill as if I am loving every single second of it. Wish me luck!

Why I Shouldn't Work from Home

2009-01-15T10:32:00.005-05:00

Dear Carrie,
Congratulations! You are officially registered for the 33rd annual Grandma's Marathon on June 20, 2009. We are looking forward to welcoming you to Duluth, and providing you with a world-class race.
***
Since it is currently -9 degrees (yes, that is a minus) in the frozen heartland, I probably should try and make up with the treadmill. Oy.

The Pearl has Two Faces

2009-01-13T10:02:00.004-05:00

Pearl was in an unusually jovial mood the other day. She, Gladys, and I were chatting when Pearl told us she used to be a teacher. I had only known that she was a nurse, not a teacher, so I asked her about it. "Well, I didn't teach for too long before I decided to be a nurse," she explained.

I asked her why she had decided to be a nurse when she already had a teaching job. "I'll tell you what made me decide. Archie did."

"Archie?" I asked.

She tells this story: Yeah, Archie. I sent him out back to bring in a bucket of water from the well. When he brought it back in, I dipped up a cup to get a drink. A little girl in the front starts saying "Teacher! Teacher! Don't drink that! Archie peed in the bucket!"

"What did you do?" I laughed.

"Ohhhh, I whacked him good and sent him home!" Pearl declared proudly.

We laughed and talked about how different things are now, and that today she probably would have gone to jail for "whacking him good." We were having fun and laughing! Which is why I thought I could get away with teasingly asking: "Pearl, what on earth do you have in that bag?" when she tried to lift her purse off her walker but couldn't because of the weight.

And just like using a light switch to turn off a light, the happy and laughing Pearl was gone and the normal, red-faced, vein-bulging, paranoid Pearl retorted (in a voice only comparable to Linda Blair's Regan), "I have everything in there I don't want STOLE!"

So much for jovial.

In the Long Run

2009-01-10T11:23:00.004-05:00

I'm late to Thank Goodness It's Friday Photo day. What a week. Rest assured when I have more time you'll be hearing all about the happy things that went down at Rock Ridge. But for now! I decided any weekend posts would NOT be about work (I love them all dearly, but I really need the weekend break). SO....here is my late photo, along with my weekend confessional.

The picture is Hubby getting ready to board the bus for Hopkinton last April. The amazing thing about this picture and that particular Boston Marathon: Hubby had shingles. Bad. And he ran a freaking marathon. And finished with his second best Boston time ever. He is an animal.

Confessional: The weather here has sucked all week which equates to no outdoor running. The other thing that sucks is me on a treadmill. On Monday before the weather turned, I logged one quality three-mile run(36 degrees and sunny). The rest of the week included two pathetic attempts at treadmill running. Score: Treadmill, 2. Me, 0.

It might be a long winter.

The View...

2009-01-06T10:04:00.004-05:00

from my office door. Joseph is fast asleep. Hee!

Let the New Year Begin

2009-01-05T11:15:00.005-05:00

So far today, the Cheaps have cleaned out the snack bar (we're talking enough snacks to feed a family of four for three weeks) AND took the baskets of crackers off the dining tables, Pearl is missing a pair of blue velvet slacks and claims Rock Ridge is the "thievenest" place she has ever lived, and la piece de resistance: A resident drove her scooter into a wine display at the grocery store.

They may never let us back in the store.